Why it's just easier to marry an American

1. Because while occasional weekend booty calls are quite nice, there's no real dating possible to get to know each other.

2. When Moneygram rejects the money I send to Dayton to pay for CeCe's school fees and I have to call them to sort it out, I have to endure this person asking who he is to me and why I'm sending it. It's none of their damn business.

3. When applying for a visa, we have to prove intent to marry and the reality of the relationship. I am not sending copies of my personal emails to them. It's none of their damn business.

4. Then I will have to fill out more and more forms. The one I dread most is the statement of support. I have to prove I can support them. How? I can afford to bring them here, but then he's working to support US. And if things get tight, I'll be floating on credit cards for a short while - but I have no doubt he'll be able to find work quickly that can support us in at least a minimal lifestyle. Hey, it's not a refugee camp, so nobody should be complaining. So, anyway, I may be begging somebody to sign a statement of support for him, just as a formality.

5. This will be the story of my life for the next 2.5 years, minimum. And then for the rest of my life there will be the questions about why I would marry an African anyway, when, in the wise words of Jenny's mom, "There must be plenty of nice boys in New Orleans." Yeah, but they're not him.

When I was younger, I scoffed at the idea of soulmates. "But what if that one person for me is somewhere in a Buddhist temple is Laos? Or in the Sahara Desert? So, I'll be alone forever because I'll never know him?"

Well, or I'll happen to run into him in a West African refugee camp.

Life's funny. I'm just not laughing too hard right now - I'm more holding my breath and crossing my fingers.