So, it was easier than I expected. We spent almost an hour going over my back story - details of my life. I know how much I make, how long I've lived here, etc. So I was set - then I went out and breezed through it.
What worries me most? How easily I lie.
Honestly, I think I was discriminated against because I'm white. Every resident there was Black or Latino, and I wasn't exactly getting the red carpet. But I'm not real worried if a single white girl can't rent there - there are so many millions of other places in the world for us.
I hope I did a good job with my report - I would love to do it more, especially to travel with the federal agents. Soon I'll be packing a piece and calling myself Scully.
OK, so now on to my other job. The supervisor there just asked if I could take ANOTHER responsibility which would work out for about 10 hours/week. I finally was able to say no. Sort of. I made some other excuse (that I'd be leaving in the middle of the course to Africa). That would push me up to working 40 hours a week PLUS 15 hours of daytime law school coursework plus limitless homework. Which wouldn't be so bad except all the running around I have to do, what with it being four different jobs.
And here I go.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Monday, October 30, 2006
Dear Concerned Citizens,
We all know what kind of trouble I am when I'm not over-busy. I pick fights with authority figures, I take off and travel the globe, I troll internet sex hook-up sites.
None of these things are good for me now.
So, I met today with director of international development program, and I am SO applying. Just sent out my requests for recommendations from old profs.
Because, I can get two degrees in the same amount of time and money, with just twice the stress. Does that not have my name written all over it?
BTW, friends, please don't use my name on here. I have to pretend to have a level of confidentiality. So, that's why sometimes comments get deleted.
BTW, I just reconnected with my camp counselor from 25 years ago. She still lives in the same apartment and received my letter and emailed me today. That is, like, so rad. And my timing rocks, because she's buying a house and moving to Michigan.
OK, back to work. Of course.
None of these things are good for me now.
So, I met today with director of international development program, and I am SO applying. Just sent out my requests for recommendations from old profs.
Because, I can get two degrees in the same amount of time and money, with just twice the stress. Does that not have my name written all over it?
BTW, friends, please don't use my name on here. I have to pretend to have a level of confidentiality. So, that's why sometimes comments get deleted.
BTW, I just reconnected with my camp counselor from 25 years ago. She still lives in the same apartment and received my letter and emailed me today. That is, like, so rad. And my timing rocks, because she's buying a house and moving to Michigan.
OK, back to work. Of course.
thanks Gail!
Yum!! Received! Promptly being consumed! I think Tamari Almonds make a delicious dinner.
my schedule
"It is very likely that I will be setting you up on an assignment tomorrow," says the Civil Rights Investigator coordinator.
Do I sound like a secret agent OR WHAT?! Way cool!
Which means, beginning this week I have FOUR JOBS. Not counting full-time law school. I accepted the tutoring at the middle school, and spent an hour there today and go back for 2.5 on Wednesday & Friday. Then, I teach LSAT two evenings a week for four hours, plus about three hours of prep for each. Then, I just accepted a tutoring position for LSAT for 15 hours over the next four weeks (plus prep time). The most difficult part of this is all the running around - not getting paid for transportation time really cuts into my quality study time.
And yes, it's cutting into gym time already. I guess that going only four days a week isn't so bad, as long as I really do go that often. It's not 6 days a week, but it's still good. And I'll need to be sure to keep eating well.
NO MORE JOBS. And I can't take that nanny position - I need all my "free" time to be study time. So, I'm staying put ... for now.
Lunch break 5 minutes over, time to get back to work!
Do I sound like a secret agent OR WHAT?! Way cool!
Which means, beginning this week I have FOUR JOBS. Not counting full-time law school. I accepted the tutoring at the middle school, and spent an hour there today and go back for 2.5 on Wednesday & Friday. Then, I teach LSAT two evenings a week for four hours, plus about three hours of prep for each. Then, I just accepted a tutoring position for LSAT for 15 hours over the next four weeks (plus prep time). The most difficult part of this is all the running around - not getting paid for transportation time really cuts into my quality study time.
And yes, it's cutting into gym time already. I guess that going only four days a week isn't so bad, as long as I really do go that often. It's not 6 days a week, but it's still good. And I'll need to be sure to keep eating well.
NO MORE JOBS. And I can't take that nanny position - I need all my "free" time to be study time. So, I'm staying put ... for now.
Lunch break 5 minutes over, time to get back to work!
Saturday, October 28, 2006
in his favor
This is what a League of Voters who agrees with me on all the major stands said about the guy I might live with, when he ran for office and they endorsed him:
"Why: an experienced civil attorney with a self-proclaimed
grassroots approach and an interest in civil rights...a change."
It doesn't make up for smoking or green Pringles, but it keeps him still in negotiations.
"Why: an experienced civil attorney with a self-proclaimed
grassroots approach and an interest in civil rights...a change."
It doesn't make up for smoking or green Pringles, but it keeps him still in negotiations.
and not an underwire
"We ask that the lady testers wear sportsbras. It goes up higher and then you can put this digital recorder inside and it will capture all the voices."
He wasn't even embarrassed to say it, this Department of Justice bigwig who was teaching us how to "test" apartment managers for racial and family status bias. They take two people who only differ in one of the protected status categories and send 'em in with scripts and fake identities; we ask the exact same things and present ourselves in the same way, and then the DOJ analyzes the outcome, including the recordings, to see if there are violations of Title VIII.
I signed up so quick my head's still spinning. I LOVE IT. This is the kind of thing I was BORN to do! I mean, I was born white, but it's not like I think that means I should have privileges denied other people, and I'll darn sure fight for equality. I hate injustice - so to have the opportunity to do something about it, well, I would probably pay to do this (but, they're going to pay me for each test I can do when they need it).
The only bad thing is it's TOTALLY CONFIDENTIAL - I'm not supposed to tell anybody anything about it at all, not even that I'm doing it or it's being done in the area. So, I'll erase this blog after friends have read it, and I will never get to speak of it publicly again. Keep it "in the vault" as Tami quoted Seinfeld.
I might not get to do it often - depends on their needs and my availability. But I am SO READY! And they said they may sometimes ask us to travel to other cities in the area to test there, too. I could be traveling and staying in hotels on the government dollar and I love it - because THIS is exactly the sort of thing our tax money SHOULD be going to.
Then I went to the possible housing situation, and the father was SOOOO sick - a horrible fever hit him shortly before I got there. I played with the kid for awhile while I told him to go nap, but I had to get a move-on because I have lots of other things to get done today.
I'm not sure if I'll take it. It's a nice area, close to the hip part of town and near grocery stores, and bikeable to school. But, I think I smelled cigarette smoke - and I so will NOT live with a smoker. I can tell the father is really depressed (manifested by a dirty house and "There's nobody to call" when I asked if I could call somebody to help him), and so I might be able to be really helpful with not much effort on my part, and he might be willing to change the things I won't live with. There was junkfood around, and I can't live with that either - I won't give kids sugar cereal for breakfast and Pringles for lunch. And the kid talked a LOT - I mean this incessant chatter and didn't listen. He likes to get his way and expects to and of course that doesn't work with me. I think though that's not a fatal problem - I mean, the kid looked at me and thought "babysitter" - and a babysitter IS there to play with the kids and cater to their whims. But I'm not a babysitter and won't be treated as such. If that's what's needed, then it won't work out.
It really made me appreciate Dayton's parenting even more. I mean, I think he's too stern, but he would never tolerate what I also consider inappropriate child-centeredness - and I get to be good cop for a change. A 5-year-old is NOT the center of the universe. They are a PART of a family. And of course their needs are desires are important, but they are not tantamount and they should not be catered to. Adults do not have to do something just because a child wants them to. He kept trying to get me to read something about a computer game and I wasn't going to.
The bedroom is a pretty nice size and could work, though I would need to paint it (it has some kid pattern and soccer balls and such). High ceilings, wood floors - a typical old-style New Orleans place. It's a double shotgun which he converted to take the bedroom from the other side - so there's two bedrooms on their side plus a double-loft which is a cool set-up. I got to see the other side, and it's a studio maybe slightly smaller than mine now - though wider, with no closet.
Anyway, I really don't know if I'll do it - I told him we'd talk later about details when he's feeling better.
He wasn't even embarrassed to say it, this Department of Justice bigwig who was teaching us how to "test" apartment managers for racial and family status bias. They take two people who only differ in one of the protected status categories and send 'em in with scripts and fake identities; we ask the exact same things and present ourselves in the same way, and then the DOJ analyzes the outcome, including the recordings, to see if there are violations of Title VIII.
I signed up so quick my head's still spinning. I LOVE IT. This is the kind of thing I was BORN to do! I mean, I was born white, but it's not like I think that means I should have privileges denied other people, and I'll darn sure fight for equality. I hate injustice - so to have the opportunity to do something about it, well, I would probably pay to do this (but, they're going to pay me for each test I can do when they need it).
The only bad thing is it's TOTALLY CONFIDENTIAL - I'm not supposed to tell anybody anything about it at all, not even that I'm doing it or it's being done in the area. So, I'll erase this blog after friends have read it, and I will never get to speak of it publicly again. Keep it "in the vault" as Tami quoted Seinfeld.
I might not get to do it often - depends on their needs and my availability. But I am SO READY! And they said they may sometimes ask us to travel to other cities in the area to test there, too. I could be traveling and staying in hotels on the government dollar and I love it - because THIS is exactly the sort of thing our tax money SHOULD be going to.
Then I went to the possible housing situation, and the father was SOOOO sick - a horrible fever hit him shortly before I got there. I played with the kid for awhile while I told him to go nap, but I had to get a move-on because I have lots of other things to get done today.
I'm not sure if I'll take it. It's a nice area, close to the hip part of town and near grocery stores, and bikeable to school. But, I think I smelled cigarette smoke - and I so will NOT live with a smoker. I can tell the father is really depressed (manifested by a dirty house and "There's nobody to call" when I asked if I could call somebody to help him), and so I might be able to be really helpful with not much effort on my part, and he might be willing to change the things I won't live with. There was junkfood around, and I can't live with that either - I won't give kids sugar cereal for breakfast and Pringles for lunch. And the kid talked a LOT - I mean this incessant chatter and didn't listen. He likes to get his way and expects to and of course that doesn't work with me. I think though that's not a fatal problem - I mean, the kid looked at me and thought "babysitter" - and a babysitter IS there to play with the kids and cater to their whims. But I'm not a babysitter and won't be treated as such. If that's what's needed, then it won't work out.
It really made me appreciate Dayton's parenting even more. I mean, I think he's too stern, but he would never tolerate what I also consider inappropriate child-centeredness - and I get to be good cop for a change. A 5-year-old is NOT the center of the universe. They are a PART of a family. And of course their needs are desires are important, but they are not tantamount and they should not be catered to. Adults do not have to do something just because a child wants them to. He kept trying to get me to read something about a computer game and I wasn't going to.
The bedroom is a pretty nice size and could work, though I would need to paint it (it has some kid pattern and soccer balls and such). High ceilings, wood floors - a typical old-style New Orleans place. It's a double shotgun which he converted to take the bedroom from the other side - so there's two bedrooms on their side plus a double-loft which is a cool set-up. I got to see the other side, and it's a studio maybe slightly smaller than mine now - though wider, with no closet.
Anyway, I really don't know if I'll do it - I told him we'd talk later about details when he's feeling better.
Friday, October 27, 2006
all in the neighborhood
I took a walk down to Whole Foods. It was a nice break from Crim Law (how many cases can I read about parents killing children, men killing the men who sodomized and then mocked them, people ruining other people's lives with automobies?) and it was fun to see all the beautiful houses decked out in Halloween garb.
I ran into Paulette, my former neighbor, who told me that two nights ago a woman two houses from where I used to live was raped when a "middle-aged Indian man" broke in her bedroom window. Our minds all went immediately to icky ex-landlord, who is Bangladeshi. (And she thought it might be rumor, so she checked with a police customer who called into the rape division and it was all confirmed.)
That would be the perfect final chapter to that saga. To Dayton, who doesn't really understand why I moved last time or why I excommunicate people I don't like, I could say, "Trust me. When I say I don't like a person, they turn out to be a rapist."
There are fireworks right now. Um, why?
The funnest thing at Whole Foods tonight? Goat Cheese Grit Cakes. And Shrimp Grit Cakes. I am SO in New Orleans! It was nice to feel like it for a little while before it's back to the grindstone.
My training tomorrow for Civil Rights Investigator is a bigger deal than I thought - the Dept. of Justice is coming and I have to interview with them to get clearance and make a schedule. OY vey!
I ran into Paulette, my former neighbor, who told me that two nights ago a woman two houses from where I used to live was raped when a "middle-aged Indian man" broke in her bedroom window. Our minds all went immediately to icky ex-landlord, who is Bangladeshi. (And she thought it might be rumor, so she checked with a police customer who called into the rape division and it was all confirmed.)
That would be the perfect final chapter to that saga. To Dayton, who doesn't really understand why I moved last time or why I excommunicate people I don't like, I could say, "Trust me. When I say I don't like a person, they turn out to be a rapist."
There are fireworks right now. Um, why?
The funnest thing at Whole Foods tonight? Goat Cheese Grit Cakes. And Shrimp Grit Cakes. I am SO in New Orleans! It was nice to feel like it for a little while before it's back to the grindstone.
My training tomorrow for Civil Rights Investigator is a bigger deal than I thought - the Dept. of Justice is coming and I have to interview with them to get clearance and make a schedule. OY vey!
Thursday, October 26, 2006
a rose
During a break today, one of my students came up and said, "I wanted to tell you how much I appreciate you pronouncing my name correctly. I never had any idea how much it mattered to me, because nobody has ever cared enough to try before."
His name is Alejandro. How freakin hard is that?
He said his kindergarten teacher made fun of his name, his teachers always told him his name is "Alexander" because his real name isn't acceptable.
TAMI! SEE HOW MUCH THE SCHOOLS HERE NEED YOU???!!!
This is heartbreaking and so sad. He's 23 years old and I'm the first teacher who has, he says, cared enough to try? He said it impacts him on so many levels - that he is more tuned in and engaged because he feels validated by me.
Every day I get more and more worried about bringing the girls here. I guess less worried for them than worried for me - because of the jail time I will have to do when I hurt any person who tries to invalidate them in any way.
His name is Alejandro. How freakin hard is that?
He said his kindergarten teacher made fun of his name, his teachers always told him his name is "Alexander" because his real name isn't acceptable.
TAMI! SEE HOW MUCH THE SCHOOLS HERE NEED YOU???!!!
This is heartbreaking and so sad. He's 23 years old and I'm the first teacher who has, he says, cared enough to try? He said it impacts him on so many levels - that he is more tuned in and engaged because he feels validated by me.
Every day I get more and more worried about bringing the girls here. I guess less worried for them than worried for me - because of the jail time I will have to do when I hurt any person who tries to invalidate them in any way.
drenched
When it rains, it pours.
So here I am, just about five weeks away from final exams starting. I'm far behind on prepping for those. The only thing I got going for me is obsessive attendance.
Tonight a student asked about how I work with law school and I said it's crazy but I do it.
But things are about to get crazier. I am starting as a Civil Rights Investigator soon. I think that won't be tooooo much time and I can fit it into my schedule, and basically I hope to just recoup gas money with that.
I'm starting as a middle school tutor next week. I'm not sure how it happened, but here I go, for a minimum of 5 hours/week. 5 hours may not sound like much, but I'm actually sitting in classes 15 hours a week - plus all the prep time for those classes. Plus, figuring in travel time to said tutoring ... it'll be a challenge.
And I may be potentially a nanny soon. At least that house is close to the middle school.
All this, with my current LSAT prep, means $$. Which makes the world go round - oh, wait, no, that's love.
So, I *could* pay that $3500 I guess - I'll just be working only for that.
What concerns me most is - what do all these jobs have in common? TEACHING! What did I come here to escape? TEACHING!
I *must* get a legal-type job this summer. I *must* leave education. It haunts me like a Baskerville hound, though. Sigh.
So here I am, just about five weeks away from final exams starting. I'm far behind on prepping for those. The only thing I got going for me is obsessive attendance.
Tonight a student asked about how I work with law school and I said it's crazy but I do it.
But things are about to get crazier. I am starting as a Civil Rights Investigator soon. I think that won't be tooooo much time and I can fit it into my schedule, and basically I hope to just recoup gas money with that.
I'm starting as a middle school tutor next week. I'm not sure how it happened, but here I go, for a minimum of 5 hours/week. 5 hours may not sound like much, but I'm actually sitting in classes 15 hours a week - plus all the prep time for those classes. Plus, figuring in travel time to said tutoring ... it'll be a challenge.
And I may be potentially a nanny soon. At least that house is close to the middle school.
All this, with my current LSAT prep, means $$. Which makes the world go round - oh, wait, no, that's love.
So, I *could* pay that $3500 I guess - I'll just be working only for that.
What concerns me most is - what do all these jobs have in common? TEACHING! What did I come here to escape? TEACHING!
I *must* get a legal-type job this summer. I *must* leave education. It haunts me like a Baskerville hound, though. Sigh.
$3500
That’s how much it will cost to hire this lawyer to do the fiancé visa, employment authorization, and status adjustment to conditional resident. It’s a good law firm, highly respected and awarded and spoken of an all that … but honestly, I hated their parking.
It’s those little things that matter to me. The ONLY parking is in a parking garage which is extremely low and extremely confusing. I DRIVE A PICKUP. Parking garages are my nemesis. Do I really want to pay that much money to have to drive over there to hold my breath and duck down in my pickup (I know, it’s completely irrational to do so, but who cares).
So, I called the Slidell lawyer that I met last month and left a message, asking her to give me a price quote. If it’s even slightly lower, I’ll go there instead. It’s a farther drive, and over a bridge that I have to hold my breath for miles (yeah, there’s a lot of no-breath time while I’m driving), but I like the idea of supporting her better. And she’s probably better qualified than the lawyer I actually met with. This one was fine and I’m sure she’s adequate, but I wasn’t feeling it (and I’m TRYING to not be prejudiced because she went to the nearby law school that is NOT as good as First Choice).
And she said maybe 6-8 months. Man. If it’s going to take that long, I should just do it myself. Sigh. She didn’t really tell me anything that I didn’t know – which is fine, I mean, it is public domain and I could look at it all myself. But the more I think about it, the more I think I can do it myself – and if there are problems along the way, I’ll deal with them or hire a professional then. I mean, I do my own taxes, clean my own house, mow my own grass – surely I can bring a refugee here myself too.
It was just really exhausting, and now I’ll go teach in an hour – which is actually good, because my students perk me right up. I just didn’t get any work done today, and now it’s dinnertime and then worktime. Tomorrow one class is cancelled so I’m out by noon, and I’m starting the weekend for real – I’ll get a haircut … and then I’m not cutting my hair again until Dayton gets here. And I better not become Rapunzel.
I am in pre-negotiations about the free rental place – I meet with them on Saturday after my training to be a Civil Rights Investigator (going to sites accused of housing discrimination). He said, “I hope [son] likes you.” I responded, “I hope we like each other.” It cuts both ways. Wow – if both these things work out, trolling on Craig’s List is SO WORTH IT.
$3500. That’s like closing costs on a house. Which I really don’t want to do without a realtor – I like how they know things and negotiate for me and all that. My last realtor made me $50K more than either of us expected because I went with my gut.
It’s all about my gut feelings. If I feel kinda icky after the meeting, I need to look at why. Sigh. I just want somebody to make all this happen for me!! I just want Dayton here!!
It’s those little things that matter to me. The ONLY parking is in a parking garage which is extremely low and extremely confusing. I DRIVE A PICKUP. Parking garages are my nemesis. Do I really want to pay that much money to have to drive over there to hold my breath and duck down in my pickup (I know, it’s completely irrational to do so, but who cares).
So, I called the Slidell lawyer that I met last month and left a message, asking her to give me a price quote. If it’s even slightly lower, I’ll go there instead. It’s a farther drive, and over a bridge that I have to hold my breath for miles (yeah, there’s a lot of no-breath time while I’m driving), but I like the idea of supporting her better. And she’s probably better qualified than the lawyer I actually met with. This one was fine and I’m sure she’s adequate, but I wasn’t feeling it (and I’m TRYING to not be prejudiced because she went to the nearby law school that is NOT as good as First Choice).
And she said maybe 6-8 months. Man. If it’s going to take that long, I should just do it myself. Sigh. She didn’t really tell me anything that I didn’t know – which is fine, I mean, it is public domain and I could look at it all myself. But the more I think about it, the more I think I can do it myself – and if there are problems along the way, I’ll deal with them or hire a professional then. I mean, I do my own taxes, clean my own house, mow my own grass – surely I can bring a refugee here myself too.
It was just really exhausting, and now I’ll go teach in an hour – which is actually good, because my students perk me right up. I just didn’t get any work done today, and now it’s dinnertime and then worktime. Tomorrow one class is cancelled so I’m out by noon, and I’m starting the weekend for real – I’ll get a haircut … and then I’m not cutting my hair again until Dayton gets here. And I better not become Rapunzel.
I am in pre-negotiations about the free rental place – I meet with them on Saturday after my training to be a Civil Rights Investigator (going to sites accused of housing discrimination). He said, “I hope [son] likes you.” I responded, “I hope we like each other.” It cuts both ways. Wow – if both these things work out, trolling on Craig’s List is SO WORTH IT.
$3500. That’s like closing costs on a house. Which I really don’t want to do without a realtor – I like how they know things and negotiate for me and all that. My last realtor made me $50K more than either of us expected because I went with my gut.
It’s all about my gut feelings. If I feel kinda icky after the meeting, I need to look at why. Sigh. I just want somebody to make all this happen for me!! I just want Dayton here!!
Craig's List
Yesterday I was chatting with Stressed-Out Korean Boy, whom I've grown really fond of. When I say, "Oh, I forgot to bring all my notes for this practice exam and I didn't study at all, planning to rely on them," he said, "You're gonna FAIL!" It's a PRACTICE EXAM. It's not for real. But I realize that's about him, not me - as he said, "I'm ALWAYS stressed-out!" And I don't judge, because I certainly can be that way.
But not right now. I'm mellow because I'm already burned-out. And, I'm already on vacation in my mind - almost every university I ever went to was on quarters, so to be here, on semesters - class is over already to me. Hopefully I kick back into gear soon because that won't serve me well come finals.
So I said to him, "Yeah, I've been wasting so much time." "Doing what?" "I'm ... I dunno. Surfing for flights." I'm going to Portland for Thanksgiving as of last night, and I'm still trying to get to NYC to get the flight to Senegal - but I just remembered I have a friend there that I haven't spoken to in like 20 years. No, I last saw her 20 years ago. She was my camp counselor when I was in, like, middle school, and when I was visiting colleges I stayed a few days with her. She's way cool and we only lost touch because I'm so damn mobile. But there's a chance she's still in the same apartment - so if I could crash on her couch when I come back, then I'll get a later flight AND I don't have to stay the night at JFK. So I wrote her a letter. An actual letter. On paper, with a pen. I felt so ... retro.
So then, I realized what I spend a large chunk of time doing - looking at Craig's List. Nobody ever seems to reply to me about furniture that I see (I am still feeling SO LUCKY that I got that awesome kitchen island there though), but I see many other interesting things. I look at the volunteer section and respond to out-of-towners who want advice about it. I saw an ad for a housing discrimination civil rights investigator and I am SO all over that - they have a training this weekend and hopefully I can get a couple classmates to go. K and I are always talking about this stuff, so it'd be cool if she would want to go.
I also saw an ad for "free room and board for childcare." So I responded, and he responded, and maybe we'll meet soon. He's a lawyer (I thought it was a woman, so I was surprised), which could help me out in several ways - saving major $$ for a few months, making some connections (as long as he's cool like that and doesn't look down on me for not seeing childcare as beneath me), and learning about all the cool, fun things to do with kids in this town. So, I dunno. I really like my little apartment here and my landlady and all that, but I'm stressed about the parking thing, and if I could NOT pay rent now that would be AWESOME. Then even I could buy a house and slowly fix it up, since I wouldn't have the pressure of paying a mortgage and paying rent. So, we would have LOTS more conversation before I would agree to anything. But if what he needs is somebody to be home in the evenings because he's working late - I can so do that, because I'm already home. And the kids are both in school, so it's not the demand of watching a 2-year-old. We could all do our homework together.
And maybe then I'd stop trolling Craig's List so much.
It's not that there's not enough time in the day, it's that I'm not using it well. I feel burned-out so I put work aside until later - because I have a later. If there were no later and I had to do it now, I would - that's how the past couple weeks were.
I dunno, maybe this experience with my test prep class is blurring my vision - they are so enjoyable that I'm regressing even further to my nanny past? Sigh.
But I'm not THAT lazy - I mean, I am getting up at 6:30 in the morning to go the gym before class. Which is where I'm going.
But not right now. I'm mellow because I'm already burned-out. And, I'm already on vacation in my mind - almost every university I ever went to was on quarters, so to be here, on semesters - class is over already to me. Hopefully I kick back into gear soon because that won't serve me well come finals.
So I said to him, "Yeah, I've been wasting so much time." "Doing what?" "I'm ... I dunno. Surfing for flights." I'm going to Portland for Thanksgiving as of last night, and I'm still trying to get to NYC to get the flight to Senegal - but I just remembered I have a friend there that I haven't spoken to in like 20 years. No, I last saw her 20 years ago. She was my camp counselor when I was in, like, middle school, and when I was visiting colleges I stayed a few days with her. She's way cool and we only lost touch because I'm so damn mobile. But there's a chance she's still in the same apartment - so if I could crash on her couch when I come back, then I'll get a later flight AND I don't have to stay the night at JFK. So I wrote her a letter. An actual letter. On paper, with a pen. I felt so ... retro.
So then, I realized what I spend a large chunk of time doing - looking at Craig's List. Nobody ever seems to reply to me about furniture that I see (I am still feeling SO LUCKY that I got that awesome kitchen island there though), but I see many other interesting things. I look at the volunteer section and respond to out-of-towners who want advice about it. I saw an ad for a housing discrimination civil rights investigator and I am SO all over that - they have a training this weekend and hopefully I can get a couple classmates to go. K and I are always talking about this stuff, so it'd be cool if she would want to go.
I also saw an ad for "free room and board for childcare." So I responded, and he responded, and maybe we'll meet soon. He's a lawyer (I thought it was a woman, so I was surprised), which could help me out in several ways - saving major $$ for a few months, making some connections (as long as he's cool like that and doesn't look down on me for not seeing childcare as beneath me), and learning about all the cool, fun things to do with kids in this town. So, I dunno. I really like my little apartment here and my landlady and all that, but I'm stressed about the parking thing, and if I could NOT pay rent now that would be AWESOME. Then even I could buy a house and slowly fix it up, since I wouldn't have the pressure of paying a mortgage and paying rent. So, we would have LOTS more conversation before I would agree to anything. But if what he needs is somebody to be home in the evenings because he's working late - I can so do that, because I'm already home. And the kids are both in school, so it's not the demand of watching a 2-year-old. We could all do our homework together.
And maybe then I'd stop trolling Craig's List so much.
It's not that there's not enough time in the day, it's that I'm not using it well. I feel burned-out so I put work aside until later - because I have a later. If there were no later and I had to do it now, I would - that's how the past couple weeks were.
I dunno, maybe this experience with my test prep class is blurring my vision - they are so enjoyable that I'm regressing even further to my nanny past? Sigh.
But I'm not THAT lazy - I mean, I am getting up at 6:30 in the morning to go the gym before class. Which is where I'm going.
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
I am that person
I took cuts in line today. The line was SO LONG at the coffee shop and I had a practice exam in 10 minutes and it was mostly people in line who were also going to that practice exam. So when The Boy Everyone Laughs At stepped up to get his coffee, I sidled up and said, "Can you get me a small French Roast, too?" and handed him $2. He was baffled and clearly not thrilled, but I reassured him it was alright.
Because really, the time consuming part is doing the whole money exchange. I wasn't REALLY holding up the line unfairly. Nobody has cause to hate me over that.
Right? Hopefully.
What does it say about me that one of the people who most cheerfully greets me calls Joseph McCarthy a "patriotic hero" and IS NOT JOKING? Sigh.
No, Gail, no package yet! Now I await it eagerly! I also have a new backpack coming (mine is very broken) and some used study guides. All sorts of good stuff is coming soon! Woo hoo!
Got my first list of potential properties from the realtor, but nothing strikes me. I really do think I want to do a full rebuild myself. I AM INSANE!! But, she gave me some lenders' names and I'll go chat and see what kind of financing I can get.
Because really, the time consuming part is doing the whole money exchange. I wasn't REALLY holding up the line unfairly. Nobody has cause to hate me over that.
Right? Hopefully.
What does it say about me that one of the people who most cheerfully greets me calls Joseph McCarthy a "patriotic hero" and IS NOT JOKING? Sigh.
No, Gail, no package yet! Now I await it eagerly! I also have a new backpack coming (mine is very broken) and some used study guides. All sorts of good stuff is coming soon! Woo hoo!
Got my first list of potential properties from the realtor, but nothing strikes me. I really do think I want to do a full rebuild myself. I AM INSANE!! But, she gave me some lenders' names and I'll go chat and see what kind of financing I can get.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
peel the chayote before steaming
I forgot. But it didn't matter - chayote is so yummalicious (and healthy, too!) that I'll even eat it with my hands, sliding each section through my teeth. They say to alternate colors of vegetables, for more nutrients, but I'm a fan of the greens - chayote, zucchini, broccoli, cucumbers, spinach, cabbage. Yum. Though I have been eyeing the pumpkins in the grocery store, thinking of a yummy pumpkin soup I had once. Or made once. I don't remember. One thing that The Roommate said when we separated is that she'll miss my cooking because she really likes it. So do I. After Jenny's visit and hitting several bad eating spots, I've pretty much given up on eating out. Isn't that CRAZY!? In New Orleans?! I'll get over it, I'm sure, but for now, I rush home to mix up a pita stuffed with 9-vegetable salad and just the lightest touch of Cesar dressing. Everyplace else, they put too much dressing on, too few vegetables, something wrong. Or a yummy chick pea-chicken-couscous dish I made last night (it's all C's this week, in honor of CeCe's cholera). All I hope is that Dayton and the girls like my cooking. Or that he does the majority of cooking. Or both.
Here are more random thoughts as I don't do my homework (it's CrimLaw, and lots of cases about parents killing their children - it's not fun and I need another break):
My Torts prof is getting to be as annoying as the stalker chick. Today in class he used my name as an example FIVE TIMES and even came up to my seat to express some BS about me being almost killed and lying in a hospital bed. OK, I'm flattered that he knows my name. Maybe he has fond associations with my name. But he needs to KNOCK IT OFF if only because The Anti-Colonizer who sits beside me is getting annoyed about all the attention in our vicinity. It's creepy, too. It's different in a class of 20 people - but we have over 70 people in the class. And it's different when you're in classes where you NEED examples and kids WANT to be used as such. Nothing like that here!
I'm in "babeville." People here (outside the law school, of course) use "babe" all the time. I was walking home from the gym today and on the way a street was blocked off for picking up debris, and the guy holding the sign and flags said, "Hold on, babe" and he ran to tell the guys to stop to let me pass. Or, I walk up to customer service at Winn Dixie to get some stamps and the woman behind the counter says, "Whacha need, babe?" Or when I run into my former neighbor Paulette at Whole Foods, I get a "How ya likin' it there, babe?"
I like the babe. I get a little miffed now when people call me "ma'am." It distances me from them. I mean, it's ok when people significantly younger say "ma'am," but not when a store clerk does.
Simultaneously, Dayton has started calling me that regularly. I'm not sure if I called him that and he picked up on it, or if he just suddenly was aware that it's a good thing to call me. I think I've even started saying it right - it's a real soft B at the end.
I still haven't gotten used to using titles here - it's awkward for me. "Yes, sir," and "Yes, ma'am," are worlds away from the reality I was raised in. But it's rude here to not. To just say "yes" or "no" is missing something - and to the people I don't want to call babe, there's a silence that puts a flashing sign above my head, "NOT FROM THE SOUTH." Because the accent, I can get it good now - my ear has it picked up and I'll slip into whatever accent is being used (though with the Chalmette accent, it doesn't feel as natural). And people, IT'S NOT A DRAWL. Dr. John speaks with a drawl, but he's not typical New Orleans. Don't get me wrong - he's pure New Orleans. I just haven't heard many people here who talk like him.
On that, check this out. Dr. John designed boxers from the NOLA Sewage and Water Board meters, with the wisdom: "Remember, the more shorts you have, the less often you have to do laundry!" Truer words never spoke. And here's a link to a good song of his.
Here are more random thoughts as I don't do my homework (it's CrimLaw, and lots of cases about parents killing their children - it's not fun and I need another break):
My Torts prof is getting to be as annoying as the stalker chick. Today in class he used my name as an example FIVE TIMES and even came up to my seat to express some BS about me being almost killed and lying in a hospital bed. OK, I'm flattered that he knows my name. Maybe he has fond associations with my name. But he needs to KNOCK IT OFF if only because The Anti-Colonizer who sits beside me is getting annoyed about all the attention in our vicinity. It's creepy, too. It's different in a class of 20 people - but we have over 70 people in the class. And it's different when you're in classes where you NEED examples and kids WANT to be used as such. Nothing like that here!
I'm in "babeville." People here (outside the law school, of course) use "babe" all the time. I was walking home from the gym today and on the way a street was blocked off for picking up debris, and the guy holding the sign and flags said, "Hold on, babe" and he ran to tell the guys to stop to let me pass. Or, I walk up to customer service at Winn Dixie to get some stamps and the woman behind the counter says, "Whacha need, babe?" Or when I run into my former neighbor Paulette at Whole Foods, I get a "How ya likin' it there, babe?"
I like the babe. I get a little miffed now when people call me "ma'am." It distances me from them. I mean, it's ok when people significantly younger say "ma'am," but not when a store clerk does.
Simultaneously, Dayton has started calling me that regularly. I'm not sure if I called him that and he picked up on it, or if he just suddenly was aware that it's a good thing to call me. I think I've even started saying it right - it's a real soft B at the end.
I still haven't gotten used to using titles here - it's awkward for me. "Yes, sir," and "Yes, ma'am," are worlds away from the reality I was raised in. But it's rude here to not. To just say "yes" or "no" is missing something - and to the people I don't want to call babe, there's a silence that puts a flashing sign above my head, "NOT FROM THE SOUTH." Because the accent, I can get it good now - my ear has it picked up and I'll slip into whatever accent is being used (though with the Chalmette accent, it doesn't feel as natural). And people, IT'S NOT A DRAWL. Dr. John speaks with a drawl, but he's not typical New Orleans. Don't get me wrong - he's pure New Orleans. I just haven't heard many people here who talk like him.
On that, check this out. Dr. John designed boxers from the NOLA Sewage and Water Board meters, with the wisdom: "Remember, the more shorts you have, the less often you have to do laundry!" Truer words never spoke. And here's a link to a good song of his.
the urge
Oh, and I realized what's making me have the overwhelming urge to pack up the mukluks and head north (though, I would need to trade in the truck for a 4-wheel-drive that can haul dog trailers).
It's cold. I woke up this morning and it was 63 degrees in my apartment. TV (at the gym) said at 7:30 it was 42 degrees in Slidell.
I'm digging on this chill - especially because it is crystal clear blue skies.
Son of Deepo Provera Inventor bets I'll stick around because I like the sunshine. He does not miss Montreal.
But what he doesn't know, what most people in the world don't know, is the cleanness of the air when cross-country skiing at night with moonlight reflecting off the snow, hearing only the "sh-sh-sh-sh" of the skis and an occasional branch snapped by Selma when she runs after something. I don't remember hating the cold in Alaska - except when it was really windy and blizzardy and it burned my skin - that wasn't fun.
It will never be so cold here, but my body - after 22 years in Alaska - is hardwired to expect it. What's winter without the Iditarod?
I'm having a REALLY hard time picturing Dayton and the girls being in Alaska. Poor folks don't have any concept of cold, being from West Africa and all. I'm a little worried that this urge won't pass and I'll come home in 2.5 years and say, "Honey, I got a really great job, and there are lots of opportunities for you there, too. And there aren't many drive-by shootings. We're moving to Fairbanks." I look at Tiff and Rick's yurt construction in Talkeetna and I'm so proud of 'em ... and I just don't see Dayton thinking any of that would be a great idea for us.
Well, hopefully after I graduate law school we'll be able to take a big family roadtrip - drive over to the West Coast and visit all in California and Oregon, then head up to Alaska, maybe driving up to Fairbanks like I used to do each year - over south to see the yurts - and then down to Haines to take the ferry through SE Alaska to see the old homestead. Maybe at that point they will all rise up and say, "We would LOVE to live here!" I mean, just to experience mosquitos that DON'T carry malaria should convince them!
But I'm not holding my breath. My dog mushing dreams may not be realized anytime soon. But I think of Alaska when I think of family - I still believe it's a great place to grow up.
It's cold. I woke up this morning and it was 63 degrees in my apartment. TV (at the gym) said at 7:30 it was 42 degrees in Slidell.
I'm digging on this chill - especially because it is crystal clear blue skies.
Son of Deepo Provera Inventor bets I'll stick around because I like the sunshine. He does not miss Montreal.
But what he doesn't know, what most people in the world don't know, is the cleanness of the air when cross-country skiing at night with moonlight reflecting off the snow, hearing only the "sh-sh-sh-sh" of the skis and an occasional branch snapped by Selma when she runs after something. I don't remember hating the cold in Alaska - except when it was really windy and blizzardy and it burned my skin - that wasn't fun.
It will never be so cold here, but my body - after 22 years in Alaska - is hardwired to expect it. What's winter without the Iditarod?
I'm having a REALLY hard time picturing Dayton and the girls being in Alaska. Poor folks don't have any concept of cold, being from West Africa and all. I'm a little worried that this urge won't pass and I'll come home in 2.5 years and say, "Honey, I got a really great job, and there are lots of opportunities for you there, too. And there aren't many drive-by shootings. We're moving to Fairbanks." I look at Tiff and Rick's yurt construction in Talkeetna and I'm so proud of 'em ... and I just don't see Dayton thinking any of that would be a great idea for us.
Well, hopefully after I graduate law school we'll be able to take a big family roadtrip - drive over to the West Coast and visit all in California and Oregon, then head up to Alaska, maybe driving up to Fairbanks like I used to do each year - over south to see the yurts - and then down to Haines to take the ferry through SE Alaska to see the old homestead. Maybe at that point they will all rise up and say, "We would LOVE to live here!" I mean, just to experience mosquitos that DON'T carry malaria should convince them!
But I'm not holding my breath. My dog mushing dreams may not be realized anytime soon. But I think of Alaska when I think of family - I still believe it's a great place to grow up.
you get what you pay for
I'm all about maximizing value and taking advantage of what I've already paid for. The mandatory student gym fees are great, actually, and I've already spent many hours there. Today, in fact, I had a hard time pulling myself away. Feel the burn!
And with the convenience of the student health center right here on campus, I let them take care of me when I scrape my toe. They are good for that. And I like that there's a lab right there. And I need to make an appointment with the "women's health" which is also right there. Pesky HPV.
But it's a little disconcerting when I go to the doctor to say I need to follow up with thyroid issues and she spends the entire time looking in books to figure out WHERE my thyroid is. Um, isn't that one of those things that a real doctor should actually, like, KNOW?
So, I wasn't insisting that I see that same doctor when I returned today (plus, she's not a great listener), so I made an appointment with a different doctor. This one could figure out where my thyroid is, but her entire medical knowledge seemed based on things that either she or her family had been through. Fibroids? Sister had 'em, made her crazy during pregnancy. Um, ok. Thyroid cyst? She had one drained also. Weight issues? She also can gain 5 pounds in a weekend and then not lose it again even with effort.
OK, well, I'm glad we bonded, but if I wanted empathy I'd call my friend. I was hoping for some, say, MEDICAL KNOWLEDGE.
The good thing is that she did make some referrals for me. To a dermatologist (just to check out some strange moles) and a nutritionist (because after 3 weeks of strictly reduced calorie intake and intense exercise - why does it say my weight is the same as when I was there three weeks ago?).
Her parting words to me? "If that endocrinologist is any good, call me and let me know!"
Sigh.
And with the convenience of the student health center right here on campus, I let them take care of me when I scrape my toe. They are good for that. And I like that there's a lab right there. And I need to make an appointment with the "women's health" which is also right there. Pesky HPV.
But it's a little disconcerting when I go to the doctor to say I need to follow up with thyroid issues and she spends the entire time looking in books to figure out WHERE my thyroid is. Um, isn't that one of those things that a real doctor should actually, like, KNOW?
So, I wasn't insisting that I see that same doctor when I returned today (plus, she's not a great listener), so I made an appointment with a different doctor. This one could figure out where my thyroid is, but her entire medical knowledge seemed based on things that either she or her family had been through. Fibroids? Sister had 'em, made her crazy during pregnancy. Um, ok. Thyroid cyst? She had one drained also. Weight issues? She also can gain 5 pounds in a weekend and then not lose it again even with effort.
OK, well, I'm glad we bonded, but if I wanted empathy I'd call my friend. I was hoping for some, say, MEDICAL KNOWLEDGE.
The good thing is that she did make some referrals for me. To a dermatologist (just to check out some strange moles) and a nutritionist (because after 3 weeks of strictly reduced calorie intake and intense exercise - why does it say my weight is the same as when I was there three weeks ago?).
Her parting words to me? "If that endocrinologist is any good, call me and let me know!"
Sigh.
more damage
A towtruck just took away a car that was hit along the side (pretty clearly a side swipe) that ripped it open like a can opener. Not just some dents and scrapes, but seriously peeled it back to where it isn't drivable (ripped out the back lights, probably exposed gas tank, etc.).
I so have to move off this street.
I so have to move off this street.
Monday, October 23, 2006
The things I do to make myself miserable
Coming back from work/training yesterday, I saw a woman putting in an “open house” sign nearby.
How could I resist? Oh, and this house – it’s PERFECT for us. Well, I won’t describe it because it will make me want it too much. And she’s accepting offers, but it’s outside my price range and there’s no rental unit, which I need to be able to make a mortgage.
But I chatted it up with the realtor and she’s going to start looking for me – she had all sorts of ideas about loans available and all that.
Yes, Tami, I hear you. I know. But why not investigate my options? It wasn’t the sanest thing the last time I bought a house, but it all worked out so well for me – I had the joys of home ownership and made enough money to do some things I really wanted to. I’m going to be here for the next 2.5 years, and it just seems to make more sense to buy instead of rent for that whole time. Rent will easily be $14,400 per year once I move – that’s $36,000 for 2.5 years. Why not be putting money into a house that I can either rent out or sell when I leave? And if there’s a rental unit attached, I could be making $9,000/year – which would mean that after 2.5 years I would be $58,500 ahead if I sell the house for what I buy it for, minus whatever I put into it (not counting the HUGE bonus of interest being tax deductible – once Dayton’s working).
Of course I’m not counting hurricanes or floods or drive-bys in that equation … but it still seems that I could at least break even and get to have more home joy in the meantime. The same urge that’s making me stuff 3 pounds of chicken in the freezer is the one making me drive to open houses. And the desire for a home with a dishwasher and washer/dryer. I’m not complaining that I don’t have these things now – but I’ll be happy when I have ‘em again.
But I also can’t shake that I came here to help rebuild. Shouldn’t I be rebuilding?
I’ll check out all my options – insurance may be a difficult thing, but the realtor had some good ideas and it might work out.
Last time I bought a house, it all worked out so perfectly. I told the realtor I’m in no hurry, but if the right situation comes along I don’t want to run screaming away from a good thing. Such as a driveway of my own. A garden and a yard for children to play. Appliances.
And Jenny, if I do buy, keep your suitcase packed. You know you’re the first one I’ll call with any color SOS – you’ll be my painting triage.
How could I resist? Oh, and this house – it’s PERFECT for us. Well, I won’t describe it because it will make me want it too much. And she’s accepting offers, but it’s outside my price range and there’s no rental unit, which I need to be able to make a mortgage.
But I chatted it up with the realtor and she’s going to start looking for me – she had all sorts of ideas about loans available and all that.
Yes, Tami, I hear you. I know. But why not investigate my options? It wasn’t the sanest thing the last time I bought a house, but it all worked out so well for me – I had the joys of home ownership and made enough money to do some things I really wanted to. I’m going to be here for the next 2.5 years, and it just seems to make more sense to buy instead of rent for that whole time. Rent will easily be $14,400 per year once I move – that’s $36,000 for 2.5 years. Why not be putting money into a house that I can either rent out or sell when I leave? And if there’s a rental unit attached, I could be making $9,000/year – which would mean that after 2.5 years I would be $58,500 ahead if I sell the house for what I buy it for, minus whatever I put into it (not counting the HUGE bonus of interest being tax deductible – once Dayton’s working).
Of course I’m not counting hurricanes or floods or drive-bys in that equation … but it still seems that I could at least break even and get to have more home joy in the meantime. The same urge that’s making me stuff 3 pounds of chicken in the freezer is the one making me drive to open houses. And the desire for a home with a dishwasher and washer/dryer. I’m not complaining that I don’t have these things now – but I’ll be happy when I have ‘em again.
But I also can’t shake that I came here to help rebuild. Shouldn’t I be rebuilding?
I’ll check out all my options – insurance may be a difficult thing, but the realtor had some good ideas and it might work out.
Last time I bought a house, it all worked out so perfectly. I told the realtor I’m in no hurry, but if the right situation comes along I don’t want to run screaming away from a good thing. Such as a driveway of my own. A garden and a yard for children to play. Appliances.
And Jenny, if I do buy, keep your suitcase packed. You know you’re the first one I’ll call with any color SOS – you’ll be my painting triage.
joke and no joke
First, the joke.
A chemist, a physicist, and an economist are stranded on a desert island. A can of peaches floats up and they try to figure out how to open it.
Chemist: We can combine these chemicals we find around and make a reaction that will heat the can to exactly 579 degrees Fahrenheit, which will cause the seal to break and the lid to pop off without harming the contents.
Physicist: We make a parabolic catapult and create the arc so the can sails, rotating, and strikes the sharp boulder at just the right speed and angle to flip off the lid without harming the contents.
Economist: Assume a can opener.
***
Trust me, it's a really, really good joke and I wish I'd known it years ago. Damn economists.
No joke, Professor of Dense Words is moving to a different school. He was untruthful to Son of Deepo Provera Inventor when he said he didn't have plans to leave. He has plans. He's on their website. Fine, he likes them better because their LSATs are 5 points higher than ours and because they don't have hurricanes that destroy his house. Fine. I'm not a groupie anymore. And I see him in half an hour and I will not pout. He doesn't care about us? Fine, we don't need him anyway.
A chemist, a physicist, and an economist are stranded on a desert island. A can of peaches floats up and they try to figure out how to open it.
Chemist: We can combine these chemicals we find around and make a reaction that will heat the can to exactly 579 degrees Fahrenheit, which will cause the seal to break and the lid to pop off without harming the contents.
Physicist: We make a parabolic catapult and create the arc so the can sails, rotating, and strikes the sharp boulder at just the right speed and angle to flip off the lid without harming the contents.
Economist: Assume a can opener.
***
Trust me, it's a really, really good joke and I wish I'd known it years ago. Damn economists.
No joke, Professor of Dense Words is moving to a different school. He was untruthful to Son of Deepo Provera Inventor when he said he didn't have plans to leave. He has plans. He's on their website. Fine, he likes them better because their LSATs are 5 points higher than ours and because they don't have hurricanes that destroy his house. Fine. I'm not a groupie anymore. And I see him in half an hour and I will not pout. He doesn't care about us? Fine, we don't need him anyway.
home from the hospital
They let CeCe out of the hospital and she'll be fine. Dayton says she's getting life back into her. YAYYYY!
Sunday, October 22, 2006
Plan B
I could drop out of law school, move back to Alaska, and have free room and board while I train dogs to run the Iditarod with me.
Don't laugh, you down southers. It's well within my realm of possibility, and the person who runs this kennel is a friend of a friend of mine.
Norm Vaughan was mushing when he was in his 80's. (Remember him, Karen? He died in the past few years - but he did hit that 100 mark.) When he was 67 and penniless and alone, he returned to Alaska and entered his first Iditarod at 69.
So, I still have time if this whole law gig doesn't work out.
Don't laugh, you down southers. It's well within my realm of possibility, and the person who runs this kennel is a friend of a friend of mine.
Norm Vaughan was mushing when he was in his 80's. (Remember him, Karen? He died in the past few years - but he did hit that 100 mark.) When he was 67 and penniless and alone, he returned to Alaska and entered his first Iditarod at 69.
So, I still have time if this whole law gig doesn't work out.
C is for cholera
That's the diagnosis, so she's getting fluids. Dayton made totally the right call, taking her to the hospital; as the CDC says: "Without treatment, death can occur within hours." But with treatment, fewer than 1% die - and treatment can be as simple as rehydration. He had tried rehydrating her, but when she wasn't getting immediately better he knew to seek professional care. He definitely gets an A in fatherhood today, as usual.
Well, I'm glad to know I have good parental instincts - cholera was my first thought, even though all he told me was vomiting and that's not usual for cholera (though it can be for children). Usually it's marked by severe diarrhea - which is actually what people there sometimes call cholera.
Phew. Of course she's not fully out of the woods yet, but the worst is hopefully over.
And deep, cleansing breaths.
On the topic of C, did you know that both cauliflower and cabbage are high in vitamin C? Just a cup of either is the daily RDA. Cauliflower has never been my favorite veg, but I was eating some last night and wondered if it is like the iceberg lettuce of the cruciferous family - but no! It's actually worth eating! It's not that I have disliked cauliflower - it just doesn't get the same adoration from me as cabbage, broccoli, beets, zucchini, chayote, etc. And a whole head of cauliflower can be daunting to eat by myself.
C is also for cars, which are mostly now parked on the lawns of my neighbors' houses. I'm not happy that the guy's car was wiped out be the tree truck (it caused a lot of damage - more than I thought from what I could see from my apartment), but that they aren't parking with abandon wherever is nice. These side-swipes are really common - a significant percentage of cars here show evidence of it - and the nicer cars that don't were probably fixed. Add narrow streets to the list of 10 reasons.
C is not for training, because my training is now officially over and my weekends are my own again - and I will be paid significantly for my time which is very nice.
OK, gym time, because I'm still too much of a wreck to focus on getting any work done right now - worries of Cece cloud my mind.
Well, I'm glad to know I have good parental instincts - cholera was my first thought, even though all he told me was vomiting and that's not usual for cholera (though it can be for children). Usually it's marked by severe diarrhea - which is actually what people there sometimes call cholera.
Phew. Of course she's not fully out of the woods yet, but the worst is hopefully over.
And deep, cleansing breaths.
On the topic of C, did you know that both cauliflower and cabbage are high in vitamin C? Just a cup of either is the daily RDA. Cauliflower has never been my favorite veg, but I was eating some last night and wondered if it is like the iceberg lettuce of the cruciferous family - but no! It's actually worth eating! It's not that I have disliked cauliflower - it just doesn't get the same adoration from me as cabbage, broccoli, beets, zucchini, chayote, etc. And a whole head of cauliflower can be daunting to eat by myself.
C is also for cars, which are mostly now parked on the lawns of my neighbors' houses. I'm not happy that the guy's car was wiped out be the tree truck (it caused a lot of damage - more than I thought from what I could see from my apartment), but that they aren't parking with abandon wherever is nice. These side-swipes are really common - a significant percentage of cars here show evidence of it - and the nicer cars that don't were probably fixed. Add narrow streets to the list of 10 reasons.
C is not for training, because my training is now officially over and my weekends are my own again - and I will be paid significantly for my time which is very nice.
OK, gym time, because I'm still too much of a wreck to focus on getting any work done right now - worries of Cece cloud my mind.
CeCe
Dayton just called me - CeCe got very sick very quickly, she's vomiting, very weak, etc. He is at the hospital with her in Accra. I'll post updates here as I learn them.
I'm racking my brain for what it could be. Cholera hit the camp there last year, but I didn't think it came on so fast (oh - it does). Ditto for typhoid. The good news is both of those things are treatable when caught quickly. It could also be malaria - but Dayton is well-acquainted with that, and the clinic nearby usually takes care of it - so it must have been different and very serious for him to take her to the hospital.
I had just sent some money to Dayton - for birthday gift for CeCe and for a new phone for him so we could actually talk (his phone kept shutting off) and for sending paperwork to me. Thank goodness for that - the hospital there isn't cheap and they will not treat if you don't have ready cash.
He sounded, of course, frantic, and I wish I were there to help.
So here, for anybody reading, is an interesting shift in realities. You see those TV commercials and you think, "Oh, that's horrible children are suffering so!" and you want to help and you rail and the unjustness of the world - but honestly, they're far away and what can you do. But here, she's my family, so if you and I are "chosen family" then she's part of your family too. She's not just some little girl in Africa who you don't know.
Saturday, October 21, 2006
a driveway of one's own
I just looked out my front door to a loud noise to see a large truck that crashed through the two cars parked along the road right in front of my apartment. It's a narrow street and I hate when people park like that - it's hard to get through. This truck (looked like a tree service, but I didn't get the license plate) didn't care - it just pushed through, pushing one up out of the way and scraping the sides of both.
That's where I have to park come December. That sucks. Bigtime.
Once when I was parked in front of Susan's house, some guy wiped out the side of my car. And I was just screwed.
So except for these neighbors who have too many cars, it's a great place to live. But I guess I have to be serious about moving soon - maybe the first of next year. I can't afford to spend a few grand fixing up my truck because the road's too narrow - mind you, there are fire hydrants and tire blow-outs to create that need.
Maybe I can figure out how to park it at Ahmed & Tami's place in Slidell while I'm gone in December - that's three weeks of no worries - their streets are wide and people don't hit the street parkers.
Dammit. I put all this effort into this new place and I'm happy - but this is a serious problem I don't see a solution to except moving someplace with a driveway of my own.
I am SO unmotivated today - at least I made it to the gym. But days behind in work and having a hard time kicking into gear.
That's where I have to park come December. That sucks. Bigtime.
Once when I was parked in front of Susan's house, some guy wiped out the side of my car. And I was just screwed.
So except for these neighbors who have too many cars, it's a great place to live. But I guess I have to be serious about moving soon - maybe the first of next year. I can't afford to spend a few grand fixing up my truck because the road's too narrow - mind you, there are fire hydrants and tire blow-outs to create that need.
Maybe I can figure out how to park it at Ahmed & Tami's place in Slidell while I'm gone in December - that's three weeks of no worries - their streets are wide and people don't hit the street parkers.
Dammit. I put all this effort into this new place and I'm happy - but this is a serious problem I don't see a solution to except moving someplace with a driveway of my own.
I am SO unmotivated today - at least I made it to the gym. But days behind in work and having a hard time kicking into gear.
coupons
Through reading the weekly ad carefully, clipping coupons, and my student discount (10% off every Saturday!), I saved $70 off my groceries today. But I look at what I got, and I'm in MAJOR NESTING. OK, when boneless skinless chicken breasts are $1.49/pound on sale, I have to buy three pounds to freeze some! Whole wheat pitas for 79 cents/6 pack - hello! I need to get three! And everything else. Well, I don't have to freeze the toothbrushes, but you get my point. I guess I'm feeling settled - my freezer is full.
And I heart carbs. The delight in buying pears for 59 cents a pound, and whole wheat bread and grapes for 99 cents a pound - yummalicious. I'm just not really a meat girl, and I'll be happy when the "regular" milk in my fridge runs out and I can get more soy milk. I like the taste better and how it makes me feel, and it doesn't make me think "oo gross" whenever I drink it.
And, completely unrelated except via running into my advisor at the grocery store, I have a crush on Professor of Dense Words. Yesterday after class K and I were sitting chatting and he stuck around and chatted a bit with us. Now of course this is one of those silly little completely innocent crushes, and I find it funny to fall into being a 4th grader again. It could easily be asserted that it's not a crush at all, but an appreciation of the effort and success he has with his teaching methodology of difficult content, but I'm calling it a crush for simplicity's sake. He may leave after December and I'll never get to take another class with him, so I should definitely take advantage of all I can learn from him now.
OK, digging back into work. Sigh.
And I heart carbs. The delight in buying pears for 59 cents a pound, and whole wheat bread and grapes for 99 cents a pound - yummalicious. I'm just not really a meat girl, and I'll be happy when the "regular" milk in my fridge runs out and I can get more soy milk. I like the taste better and how it makes me feel, and it doesn't make me think "oo gross" whenever I drink it.
And, completely unrelated except via running into my advisor at the grocery store, I have a crush on Professor of Dense Words. Yesterday after class K and I were sitting chatting and he stuck around and chatted a bit with us. Now of course this is one of those silly little completely innocent crushes, and I find it funny to fall into being a 4th grader again. It could easily be asserted that it's not a crush at all, but an appreciation of the effort and success he has with his teaching methodology of difficult content, but I'm calling it a crush for simplicity's sake. He may leave after December and I'll never get to take another class with him, so I should definitely take advantage of all I can learn from him now.
OK, digging back into work. Sigh.
Friday, October 20, 2006
Tami has spoken
"And NO, OH MY SOUL! you shouldn't buy a house. Do you know what the insurance would be, IF you can even get it in N.O.?!! CHILD!! Get that itch outta your head!! I'm hearing of so many problems with getting insurance for new purchases. And what kind of trouble would it be to sell in 2 years, with this city going downhill.... just my thoughts.... "
Sigh. She's right.
So, I know that y'all think it is SO FUNNY that I have a stalker BUT I DON'T! I forget all the things she does that I find so annoying but here are a few:
- she asks questions in class and then says things like "OK, so [insert my name here] and I decide to rob a store together and ..." I wouldn't GO to the store with her much less ROB a store with her.
- She asked if I was going to "Law School Prom" and I said no. And she WOULDN'T LET IT GO. She just kept bugging about it. Why does she care if I go, and how does it figure as any of her business about anything I do?
- I wore sweatpants to my last class today so I'd go straight to the gym to save time and motivate me to make it there. Guess who showed up there after sitting next to me in that class? That CREEPS ME OUT.
OK, I'm done with that topic.
So, after 12 days of South Beath, I lost less than 6 pounds. Not all that exciting. So, I go through two weeks of expensive non-satisfying eating for ONE WEEKEND WITH JENNY? How is life fair? Jenny - WHAT DID WE EAT?? I remember falafel and beignets - but did I really eat THAT MUCH?? Anyway, so on Sunday I'm officially switching to Phase 2, where I DO get carbs. Oh, joy is me. I'm thinking grapes and whole wheat pita bread and oatmeal will do this body good. Unfortunately the person holding my carbs is out of town, so some other yumness will have to wait even longer.
So, I need to have faith in karma because by doing the right thing I might have done a stupid thing. I noticed that my apartment is wired wrong so that the adjoining apartment would be paying for my front lights. No big deal, so I pointed it out and the landlord had people come today (a story in itself). OK, for some reason these lights seem to suck an insane amount of energy, so I'll end up paying significantly more for electricity. Sigh. I'll actually document how much and if it defies all logic I'll insist that a real electrician come and fix it.
Thursday, October 19, 2006
gotta love that karma
How did my teaching begin tonight? First, before classes started, my supervisor said that one of the students who is repeating the course and was sitting in with me last time was raving about how wonderful I am. I could tell we'd hit it off and I liked him and he was really enthusiastic. I thought that was sweet of him to do that (and maybe I'll get a raise!).
Then I went early into the classroom and we shot the breeze and I talked about wanting to buy a house, and they got all protective. "Well, you have to tell us what neighborhood and we'll tell you if it's ok." I said yeah but I can't do it now because I can't sheetrock myself and Bearded Boy said, "Just call me and I'll come do it." Then Chalmette Girl said, "I live in a really good neighborhood - do you want me to get the numbers for you from all my neighbors who are selling?" I LOVE MY CLASS! They are SUCH sweet people. We talked about New Orleans, and they're all from this general area (Louisiana, Alabama, Mississippi), and they had some interesting things to say. I told 'em about Jenny and no game face in New Orleans and they totally agreed - they hate bigger cities because people don't look at you, don't talk to you. Here, it's different. And despite guys who cut up and cook their girlfriends and all the young males killed in drug deals, the people are the best part of New Orleans.
How did my teaching end? With Happy Dance Girl asking, "Have you thought of being a teacher, like for real?" "I have been a teacher - since like 12 years ago." "I know but like, college?" "I did teach college for awhile." "Oh, well you should keep doing it. I mean, I know that you want to be a lawyer and all, but you are SUCH a good teacher." There was solid agreement around the room and Chalmette Girl added, "I'm so happy I have you as my teacher!" A woman who was making up a class from another section came up and said, "At break I left a note at the desk for the manager to call me tomorrow. I started a couple weeks ago with another guy but it's like they all say - you're such a great teacher - so I want to switch into your class." And I actually worked her - she came in with the game face and I slowly incorporated her into the class, taking it a little easy on her; in the beginning she silently sat back there, but then she started volunteering and explaining and all that. I did learn some really valuable skills in all my years in the teaching trenches - it's not just about manipulation, but about a sense of belonging.
OK, so I'll not neglect to mention that in the middle there I totally bombed out on this logic game and told them something really wrong and was caught and couldn't get my sea legs back for the rest of that section. LOGIC GAMES ARE THE EASIEST FOR ME. But standing up there explaining, it's totally different. Chalmette Girl said, "But it's good because it shows us that you're like a real person, not just some mathematical genius up there." Um, thanks, I think?
I know I'm totally stressed and don't have enough time for anything, but the class is giving me even more than I'd hoped for - I'm meeting more actual New Orleanians and learning more about the area, and when I'm not tripping over my tongue to draw grids wrong, I'm enjoying what I'm doing because they're mostly getting it. Bearded Boy was totally NOT getting it but we had a really good chat after class and I got him back on track.
Now, if they put their love behind some house renovations, then I'm interested in hearing their appreciation for me.
But how funny is this timing - I just made a point yesterday to make my professor feel appreciated for his hard work - and then they did the same for me today. Gotta love that karma.
Speaking of that professor, we had a 75-minute practice exam in there. I looked at it, it took maybe 5 minutes to read thoroughly (it was long) ... and I couldn't think of more than 10 minutes worth of writing to say. I looked around and thought, "What on earth am I missing?" I wrote for about 15 minutes and a few people started turning in their tests so I finished up and turned in mine. Walked out with a woman who turned to me on the way out and said, "OK, that was all about subject matter, right?" "Yeah, there was no real diversity, so they couldn't be in a federal court. What else was there?"
I am SO GLAD it's a practice exam because I know I missed something major. Maybe I just don't write out enough. Dang. I need lots more practice. Thank goodness I have like 7 more weeks. Time to study even harder! Two more practice exams to go and hopefully no more training after this weekend, and then I'll have more time again to breathe.
Or, I'll lose the adrenaline that's been fueling me of late. Hope not!
Then I went early into the classroom and we shot the breeze and I talked about wanting to buy a house, and they got all protective. "Well, you have to tell us what neighborhood and we'll tell you if it's ok." I said yeah but I can't do it now because I can't sheetrock myself and Bearded Boy said, "Just call me and I'll come do it." Then Chalmette Girl said, "I live in a really good neighborhood - do you want me to get the numbers for you from all my neighbors who are selling?" I LOVE MY CLASS! They are SUCH sweet people. We talked about New Orleans, and they're all from this general area (Louisiana, Alabama, Mississippi), and they had some interesting things to say. I told 'em about Jenny and no game face in New Orleans and they totally agreed - they hate bigger cities because people don't look at you, don't talk to you. Here, it's different. And despite guys who cut up and cook their girlfriends and all the young males killed in drug deals, the people are the best part of New Orleans.
How did my teaching end? With Happy Dance Girl asking, "Have you thought of being a teacher, like for real?" "I have been a teacher - since like 12 years ago." "I know but like, college?" "I did teach college for awhile." "Oh, well you should keep doing it. I mean, I know that you want to be a lawyer and all, but you are SUCH a good teacher." There was solid agreement around the room and Chalmette Girl added, "I'm so happy I have you as my teacher!" A woman who was making up a class from another section came up and said, "At break I left a note at the desk for the manager to call me tomorrow. I started a couple weeks ago with another guy but it's like they all say - you're such a great teacher - so I want to switch into your class." And I actually worked her - she came in with the game face and I slowly incorporated her into the class, taking it a little easy on her; in the beginning she silently sat back there, but then she started volunteering and explaining and all that. I did learn some really valuable skills in all my years in the teaching trenches - it's not just about manipulation, but about a sense of belonging.
OK, so I'll not neglect to mention that in the middle there I totally bombed out on this logic game and told them something really wrong and was caught and couldn't get my sea legs back for the rest of that section. LOGIC GAMES ARE THE EASIEST FOR ME. But standing up there explaining, it's totally different. Chalmette Girl said, "But it's good because it shows us that you're like a real person, not just some mathematical genius up there." Um, thanks, I think?
I know I'm totally stressed and don't have enough time for anything, but the class is giving me even more than I'd hoped for - I'm meeting more actual New Orleanians and learning more about the area, and when I'm not tripping over my tongue to draw grids wrong, I'm enjoying what I'm doing because they're mostly getting it. Bearded Boy was totally NOT getting it but we had a really good chat after class and I got him back on track.
Now, if they put their love behind some house renovations, then I'm interested in hearing their appreciation for me.
But how funny is this timing - I just made a point yesterday to make my professor feel appreciated for his hard work - and then they did the same for me today. Gotta love that karma.
Speaking of that professor, we had a 75-minute practice exam in there. I looked at it, it took maybe 5 minutes to read thoroughly (it was long) ... and I couldn't think of more than 10 minutes worth of writing to say. I looked around and thought, "What on earth am I missing?" I wrote for about 15 minutes and a few people started turning in their tests so I finished up and turned in mine. Walked out with a woman who turned to me on the way out and said, "OK, that was all about subject matter, right?" "Yeah, there was no real diversity, so they couldn't be in a federal court. What else was there?"
I am SO GLAD it's a practice exam because I know I missed something major. Maybe I just don't write out enough. Dang. I need lots more practice. Thank goodness I have like 7 more weeks. Time to study even harder! Two more practice exams to go and hopefully no more training after this weekend, and then I'll have more time again to breathe.
Or, I'll lose the adrenaline that's been fueling me of late. Hope not!
but then ...
My landruler is the coolest. She just told me not even to worry about paying a security deposit at all. Of course, my rent ain't cheap, but she's given me a break on lots of things like this and doesn't make me sign a lease and all that. And when I told her I was toying with the idea of buying a house and these bad contractors have really spooked me, she said I just needed to tell her and she could get me in touch with really good workers instead.
It's all about the social capital.
So here I am - thinking on the one hand I want to leave this crazy place, and on the other hand wanting to buy a house and settle in (though, we all know I could sell it in two years without tax consequences, and I've certainly done it before). Owning property is a great investment - I can house myself now and rent it out later. I know there are all sorts of potential problems with that, so I could even just sell it later and even if I break even I've gotten ahead. Now she's got me all thinking about it again. Sigh.
It's all about the social capital.
So here I am - thinking on the one hand I want to leave this crazy place, and on the other hand wanting to buy a house and settle in (though, we all know I could sell it in two years without tax consequences, and I've certainly done it before). Owning property is a great investment - I can house myself now and rent it out later. I know there are all sorts of potential problems with that, so I could even just sell it later and even if I break even I've gotten ahead. Now she's got me all thinking about it again. Sigh.
top ten reasons to leave this city
OK, I might have to say already - TAMI WAS RIGHT.
1. My car insurance more than DOUBLED to $1700/year for not even driving. EVERYTHING is expensive here (except gas, which is slightly cheaper than SoCal - but again, I don't really drive) - including food basics.
2. Cockroaches. Sandals at night are at your own peril.
3. Garbage everywhere because people haven't figured out how to put it in cans and set it out the day before pick-up. I'm not even talking about gutting debris - I'm talking pizza boxes and beer cans that get dragged all over by animals (have I mentioned the rats?) and weather because people don't use trash cans.
4. West Nile virus - now 161 reported cases in the state.
5. At least a murder a night in a town of less than 200,000 people.
6. We're still surrounded by devastated ungutted houses - 14 months after Katrina!
7. Entergy (gas & electric) rates may even triple - they're already the highest in the nation. (Former roommate says her new place just got a bill for $900; Harry Anderson of Night Court fame is leaving NOLA because of $17,000 electric bill for a storage area.)
8. Potholes the size of some Northeastern states.
9. The corruption of the politics here rivals collapsing states across time and space. Nagin (mayor) just endorsed Jefferson (Representative who's been busted with all sorts of unethical violations) just because Jefferson endorsed him.
10. I know people all across the country think their school system is the worst - but New Orleans wins hands down. There are all these charter schools without real supervision that just opened, and the regular schools were all taken over by the state who can't even hire teachers or provide toilet paper, and parents don't know where to enroll their students, and schools don't open on time, and there's been a string of student attacks on security of late (and probably vice-versa).
but the winner HAS to be today the headline:
Man kills, dismembers, and cooks girlfriend.
So, does the local culture of music and food and NOT box stores make up for this? Am I just complaining because I want to live in a protected seal-packed world?
I love my First Choice Law School and the little world I've started to create here. First Choice Law School has all the classes I want and all the connections I need to get a great career start, and New Orleans is under my skin in mostly a good way. But I need to really consider if this is the best place to bring children. Yeah, I know, they're in refugee camps now - but maybe I need to look at other law schools to transfer to. Or, maybe I can stick it out another 2.5 years. That just sounds really long when I have to keep dodging stray drive-by bullets and flying cockroaches.
1. My car insurance more than DOUBLED to $1700/year for not even driving. EVERYTHING is expensive here (except gas, which is slightly cheaper than SoCal - but again, I don't really drive) - including food basics.
2. Cockroaches. Sandals at night are at your own peril.
3. Garbage everywhere because people haven't figured out how to put it in cans and set it out the day before pick-up. I'm not even talking about gutting debris - I'm talking pizza boxes and beer cans that get dragged all over by animals (have I mentioned the rats?) and weather because people don't use trash cans.
4. West Nile virus - now 161 reported cases in the state.
5. At least a murder a night in a town of less than 200,000 people.
6. We're still surrounded by devastated ungutted houses - 14 months after Katrina!
7. Entergy (gas & electric) rates may even triple - they're already the highest in the nation. (Former roommate says her new place just got a bill for $900; Harry Anderson of Night Court fame is leaving NOLA because of $17,000 electric bill for a storage area.)
8. Potholes the size of some Northeastern states.
9. The corruption of the politics here rivals collapsing states across time and space. Nagin (mayor) just endorsed Jefferson (Representative who's been busted with all sorts of unethical violations) just because Jefferson endorsed him.
10. I know people all across the country think their school system is the worst - but New Orleans wins hands down. There are all these charter schools without real supervision that just opened, and the regular schools were all taken over by the state who can't even hire teachers or provide toilet paper, and parents don't know where to enroll their students, and schools don't open on time, and there's been a string of student attacks on security of late (and probably vice-versa).
but the winner HAS to be today the headline:
Man kills, dismembers, and cooks girlfriend.
So, does the local culture of music and food and NOT box stores make up for this? Am I just complaining because I want to live in a protected seal-packed world?
I love my First Choice Law School and the little world I've started to create here. First Choice Law School has all the classes I want and all the connections I need to get a great career start, and New Orleans is under my skin in mostly a good way. But I need to really consider if this is the best place to bring children. Yeah, I know, they're in refugee camps now - but maybe I need to look at other law schools to transfer to. Or, maybe I can stick it out another 2.5 years. That just sounds really long when I have to keep dodging stray drive-by bullets and flying cockroaches.
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
my insurance just doubled!
Why? Was I in an accident? No. Did I add somebody to my account? No. (It will cost a fortune to add Dayton.)
No, I just finally acknowledged my change of address to Geico, and it DOUBLED my auto insurance.
That, on top of skyrocketing energy bills and all that - it's INSANE! And mind you - I DON'T DRIVE TO SCHOOL and it's only a mile to work. I estimated 2,000 miles on my truck this year - and my insurance is $1600/year! GOOD GRIEF! If I only really drove 2,000 miles, that would be almost a dollar a mile JUST FOR INSURANCE.
Sigh. When I have more time, I'll research other options. Sigh.
No, I just finally acknowledged my change of address to Geico, and it DOUBLED my auto insurance.
That, on top of skyrocketing energy bills and all that - it's INSANE! And mind you - I DON'T DRIVE TO SCHOOL and it's only a mile to work. I estimated 2,000 miles on my truck this year - and my insurance is $1600/year! GOOD GRIEF! If I only really drove 2,000 miles, that would be almost a dollar a mile JUST FOR INSURANCE.
Sigh. When I have more time, I'll research other options. Sigh.
unverschaemt
I am the teacher's pet. I went to go see Professor of Dense Words to ask him how best to prepare for exams in his class. When I had asked him earlier if he had supplemental readings to suggest, he literally staggered backwards, clutched his heart and exclaimed, "I'm so offended!" None of it was melodramatic, just genuine.
So, I tried again, this time with more forethought.
He was exhausted and he doesn't wear it well. I felt really selfish and like a bad person for inquiring of him at that hour, but he was gracious and had really good ideas for me (and even said that I'm clearly more prepared than many in the class, that he can tell - I'd thought for awhile that he hadn't noticed me because I was like the ONLY person whose name he had to check on the seating chart before he called on me until recently - in contrast to my Torts class where I'm the ONLY person whose name he knows).
As I was getting ready to leave, he requested that I remind him tomorrow after class that he needs to go to the room to give us our practice exam. He is, he said, completely wiped out after class. Earlier he had begun relying on me to remember things like what time our review session is and the like (I write all these things down immediately because I often have conflicts), and he even started looking at me before answering and I would mouth or gesture when & where. I've always had kids who would do these things for me - I'm just paying it back.
"I understand about you being wiped out after class." I stood at the door, wondering how far into teacher petdom I wanted to go, but he deserved it. "I want to tell you how much I appreciate the quality of your teaching. And I'm an experienced teacher & educationalist, and so I know how much work you put into it and how draining it can be. And you do a really outstanding job, and I thank you."
He was touched, and it was a great way for him to end a Wednesday.
So then I had two more classes (why doesn't my Wednesday end at 5:00 like normal people?) and I was so out of it in my last class that I couldn't even focus on the words in front of me.
It was time to break the South Beach. It was time for carbs. Fortunately Dr. Agatson possessed my body in those moments and when I got home I found a frozen whole wheat pita that I stuffed with salad and chicken breast. And bread - it does a body good. I probably just gained three pounds with it - but it was worth it.
Time for some intensive study prep. These classes are all graded based on one anonymous exam so sucking up to the teacher doesn't do anything for me at all. Energy is better spent on outlining and memorizing.
So, I tried again, this time with more forethought.
He was exhausted and he doesn't wear it well. I felt really selfish and like a bad person for inquiring of him at that hour, but he was gracious and had really good ideas for me (and even said that I'm clearly more prepared than many in the class, that he can tell - I'd thought for awhile that he hadn't noticed me because I was like the ONLY person whose name he had to check on the seating chart before he called on me until recently - in contrast to my Torts class where I'm the ONLY person whose name he knows).
As I was getting ready to leave, he requested that I remind him tomorrow after class that he needs to go to the room to give us our practice exam. He is, he said, completely wiped out after class. Earlier he had begun relying on me to remember things like what time our review session is and the like (I write all these things down immediately because I often have conflicts), and he even started looking at me before answering and I would mouth or gesture when & where. I've always had kids who would do these things for me - I'm just paying it back.
"I understand about you being wiped out after class." I stood at the door, wondering how far into teacher petdom I wanted to go, but he deserved it. "I want to tell you how much I appreciate the quality of your teaching. And I'm an experienced teacher & educationalist, and so I know how much work you put into it and how draining it can be. And you do a really outstanding job, and I thank you."
He was touched, and it was a great way for him to end a Wednesday.
So then I had two more classes (why doesn't my Wednesday end at 5:00 like normal people?) and I was so out of it in my last class that I couldn't even focus on the words in front of me.
It was time to break the South Beach. It was time for carbs. Fortunately Dr. Agatson possessed my body in those moments and when I got home I found a frozen whole wheat pita that I stuffed with salad and chicken breast. And bread - it does a body good. I probably just gained three pounds with it - but it was worth it.
Time for some intensive study prep. These classes are all graded based on one anonymous exam so sucking up to the teacher doesn't do anything for me at all. Energy is better spent on outlining and memorizing.
here's my head spinning
First, I have to say how much it amuses me that one friend, Gail, does not consider a day to be complete unless she has eaten meat (recent blog entry). Not large quantities, but at least a little. To the other extreme, my friend Tami does not even eat animal products, and no meat for 20 years.
I love diversity!
But the real point, why my head is spinning:
Here's just a taste of what we get every day, all day long.
I emailed my prof:
What's the difference? It seems that Art. IV speaks on both due process isues as addressed in Amendment XIV (which first calls it due process) and full faith and credit which is addressed in 1738. What am I missing/have I forgot?
His reply:
Confusion warranted. It is true that FF&C to judgments (as well as the qualification for judgments lacking in jurisdiction), is addressed by article IV, at least as construed by the Court; and the qualification on FF&C is also addressed by DP (of course, before the DP clause of the 14th A, FF&C was all you had). So, they do similar work in some sense by qualifying the constitutional scope of FF&C: judgments lacking in PJ are not given FF&C. The DP clause does not, however, mandate FF&C to anything; it only limits it (arguably in a way that FF&C under Art IV already did).
[ If you really want to get technical . . . the non enforceability of judgments lacking in PJ could only be enforced “collaterally” under Art IV (i.e., in a later proceeding seeking recognition of an earlier judgment). DP meant that a judgment could be challenged (as Field puts it) “directly” i.e., on appeal to the u.s. supreme court from a lower state court proceeding that was arguably lacking in PJ. You could not do that under article IV. In that respect DP did add something to FF&C.]
The FF&C statute, on the other hand, in effect defines the scope (or perhaps even meaning) of FF&C. FF&C is not a self-defining term. The statute says that “full” = “same” credit the judgment rendering state would give it (subject to a DP limitation). No more, no less. Also, FF&C statute is read as saying that federal courts as well as state courts shall give FF&C to state court judgments. Article IV FF&C only speaks to the credit that a STATE court has to give another state court judgment. 1738 is an exercise of the power to enforce the FF&C clause that is included in clause 1 of article IV.
I love diversity!
But the real point, why my head is spinning:
Here's just a taste of what we get every day, all day long.
I emailed my prof:
What's the difference? It seems that Art. IV speaks on both due process isues as addressed in Amendment XIV (which first calls it due process) and full faith and credit which is addressed in 1738. What am I missing/have I forgot?
His reply:
Confusion warranted. It is true that FF&C to judgments (as well as the qualification for judgments lacking in jurisdiction), is addressed by article IV, at least as construed by the Court; and the qualification on FF&C is also addressed by DP (of course, before the DP clause of the 14th A, FF&C was all you had). So, they do similar work in some sense by qualifying the constitutional scope of FF&C: judgments lacking in PJ are not given FF&C. The DP clause does not, however, mandate FF&C to anything; it only limits it (arguably in a way that FF&C under Art IV already did).
[ If you really want to get technical . . . the non enforceability of judgments lacking in PJ could only be enforced “collaterally” under Art IV (i.e., in a later proceeding seeking recognition of an earlier judgment). DP meant that a judgment could be challenged (as Field puts it) “directly” i.e., on appeal to the u.s. supreme court from a lower state court proceeding that was arguably lacking in PJ. You could not do that under article IV. In that respect DP did add something to FF&C.]
The FF&C statute, on the other hand, in effect defines the scope (or perhaps even meaning) of FF&C. FF&C is not a self-defining term. The statute says that “full” = “same” credit the judgment rendering state would give it (subject to a DP limitation). No more, no less. Also, FF&C statute is read as saying that federal courts as well as state courts shall give FF&C to state court judgments. Article IV FF&C only speaks to the credit that a STATE court has to give another state court judgment. 1738 is an exercise of the power to enforce the FF&C clause that is included in clause 1 of article IV.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
teacher voice
I'm getting the teacher voice back. Not the scoldy one, but the one that can talk for four hours and not lose it, the one that can project over very loud A/C units.
My class is nice people, and I guess that's not common. One of my guys tonight was a repeater, he took it before, and he said last time it was a bunch of university students who were hard to deal with. My supervisor said half of the classes he taught were full of jerks.
Lucky me, nary a jerk. The guy who seemed less engaged, I got really pulled in tonight. But another guy showed up who took the class last session, and his score is higher than mine - over the 90th percentile required to be a testprep instructor. If *I* were in the class, I would be bored - I'm sure he's incredibly bored. Why did he come? He left early, and hopefully if he feels that way he doesn't come back. He's nice and all - they're all nice, though we almost had a little skirmish of nice boys trying to sit in the seat closest to me without invading my space. Geeks.
I wish I could go right to sleep when I get home late, but I can't - but also I don't want to start any work because then I'll be up too late. And Wednesday is hell day, though most of my days lately could be called that.
Anyway, I'm counting my lucky stars that I have such nice people to spend time with two evenings a week. We laugh, we joke around, and they all do whatever I say. What more could I want in a regular date? They ask questions when they don't understand, they nod when they get it - they communicate and they encourage and they actually show respect to me and to each other. I think I only have 8 more sessions to teach. Cool, because this stress is pretty intense right now, but also a bummer since most of the groups suck and I probably got the best one I ever will.
Well, maybe that's where being a veteran teacher comes into play. I don't know this information hands-down, but I certainly should know how to work a room by now. I don't have to scold or give the teacher look, I just have to make them feel supported and encouraged (though I did give the look to the guys who didn't do their homework - why the heck would they pay $1300 for a class that will only help them if they do their homework??). One of them stayed afterward and continued to profusely apologize for not doing his homework, and I said, "You're not an 8th grader; I'm not scolding you." "I know, I just ... I don't want you to think I'm some dumb kid."
Ah yeah. I have 'em JUST where I want 'em. Because if they care what I think, they do the right thing. THIS is why being a veteran teacher rocks - I know so much about the psychology of manipulation and control. Of course, NONE of it works on Dayton. Men.
Tired enough now to go to sleep? Hope so, because I'm up at the crack of dawn. Again.
My class is nice people, and I guess that's not common. One of my guys tonight was a repeater, he took it before, and he said last time it was a bunch of university students who were hard to deal with. My supervisor said half of the classes he taught were full of jerks.
Lucky me, nary a jerk. The guy who seemed less engaged, I got really pulled in tonight. But another guy showed up who took the class last session, and his score is higher than mine - over the 90th percentile required to be a testprep instructor. If *I* were in the class, I would be bored - I'm sure he's incredibly bored. Why did he come? He left early, and hopefully if he feels that way he doesn't come back. He's nice and all - they're all nice, though we almost had a little skirmish of nice boys trying to sit in the seat closest to me without invading my space. Geeks.
I wish I could go right to sleep when I get home late, but I can't - but also I don't want to start any work because then I'll be up too late. And Wednesday is hell day, though most of my days lately could be called that.
Anyway, I'm counting my lucky stars that I have such nice people to spend time with two evenings a week. We laugh, we joke around, and they all do whatever I say. What more could I want in a regular date? They ask questions when they don't understand, they nod when they get it - they communicate and they encourage and they actually show respect to me and to each other. I think I only have 8 more sessions to teach. Cool, because this stress is pretty intense right now, but also a bummer since most of the groups suck and I probably got the best one I ever will.
Well, maybe that's where being a veteran teacher comes into play. I don't know this information hands-down, but I certainly should know how to work a room by now. I don't have to scold or give the teacher look, I just have to make them feel supported and encouraged (though I did give the look to the guys who didn't do their homework - why the heck would they pay $1300 for a class that will only help them if they do their homework??). One of them stayed afterward and continued to profusely apologize for not doing his homework, and I said, "You're not an 8th grader; I'm not scolding you." "I know, I just ... I don't want you to think I'm some dumb kid."
Ah yeah. I have 'em JUST where I want 'em. Because if they care what I think, they do the right thing. THIS is why being a veteran teacher rocks - I know so much about the psychology of manipulation and control. Of course, NONE of it works on Dayton. Men.
Tired enough now to go to sleep? Hope so, because I'm up at the crack of dawn. Again.
CeCe is 10 today!
Practice Test #1 down ... three more to go. I didn't suck too bad ... maybe like a B- ... I forgot to give enough info on some things, and I ran out of time. Only one test gets graded, so for me it's just a good check about what things I haven't yet mastered (like, legal cause!).
I just picked up trash all around the outside of MY house because the neighbors put their trash on the curb all week on trashbags - not in the trash cans and not waiting until close to trash pickup day. So pizza boxes and cups and dryer sheets were blown all around. Crazy. And then one of them thinks that the spot right in front of MY apartment is HIS spot - which for now is fine, but come December when the neighbor moves in and one of us has to park on the street - I might just do it to be mean because my truck is almost always home and it would be a clear signal NOT to park there (though, I do work evenings ...). Not mean, just asserting territorial rights.
Have bad headache, making concentrating OH so difficult. It's a long day of 11 hours of straight work, well, really more for the 2 hours before I took my test at 9 am. Thank goodness for microwaves!
Weather here is icky now - really hot and muggy and rainy. It looks cool but I step out and it's like a sana. I'll be ready for some REAL cooled off weather! Ready to stop running my A/C!
In between classes I actually reached Dayton (phone problems lately) and sang "Happy Birthday" to CeCe on the phone while all sorts of law students were all around. She's not great on the phone - all she basically says is "yes," but I got a giggle and a thank you and I miss you and all that.
OK, must read 50 more pages of CrimLaw for tomorrow, finish my research for Legal Research and Writing, make an outline of everything we've learning in Civil Procedure so far, prep tonight's 4 hours of teaching, mop the floors, and eat dinner in the next hour and a half. Well, some of that clearly won't get done.
I just picked up trash all around the outside of MY house because the neighbors put their trash on the curb all week on trashbags - not in the trash cans and not waiting until close to trash pickup day. So pizza boxes and cups and dryer sheets were blown all around. Crazy. And then one of them thinks that the spot right in front of MY apartment is HIS spot - which for now is fine, but come December when the neighbor moves in and one of us has to park on the street - I might just do it to be mean because my truck is almost always home and it would be a clear signal NOT to park there (though, I do work evenings ...). Not mean, just asserting territorial rights.
Have bad headache, making concentrating OH so difficult. It's a long day of 11 hours of straight work, well, really more for the 2 hours before I took my test at 9 am. Thank goodness for microwaves!
Weather here is icky now - really hot and muggy and rainy. It looks cool but I step out and it's like a sana. I'll be ready for some REAL cooled off weather! Ready to stop running my A/C!
In between classes I actually reached Dayton (phone problems lately) and sang "Happy Birthday" to CeCe on the phone while all sorts of law students were all around. She's not great on the phone - all she basically says is "yes," but I got a giggle and a thank you and I miss you and all that.
OK, must read 50 more pages of CrimLaw for tomorrow, finish my research for Legal Research and Writing, make an outline of everything we've learning in Civil Procedure so far, prep tonight's 4 hours of teaching, mop the floors, and eat dinner in the next hour and a half. Well, some of that clearly won't get done.
Monday, October 16, 2006
because I deserve it!
That's my answer to myself about, well, just about everything now.
Should I go to the gym and blow off studying for an hour? Yes! I deserve it!
Should I buy the new pots I've been ogling for eternity? Yes! I deserve it!
Ah, it's a quality of life issue. I still haven't stopped fondling the kitchen island (which is more like a coastline in my little kitchen) that Ahmed helped me get. If I didn't have it, my quality of life would be sooooo much lower. And it's the same with the pots and pans - they are WONDERFUL! And, everybody in line and the salesclerk told me, too. I've been cooking up a storm with 'em and they are everything I expected and more. I even found a Foreman grill for sale which I got, too, because while I don't much like cleaning the thing, it does SUCH a great job of cooking up meat and reducing the fat.
Why aren't men like that, being all I expected and more? OK, Dayton of late has been the perfect long-distant boyfriend. We'll see how long THAT lasts, but I can't complain right now. We made a pretty serious decision that he'll come without the girls and they'll come later. I was feeling really overwhelmed with just these logistics of how to get them enrolled in a good school in this district that doesn't have enough teachers and there are all these horror stories of schools here right now. And even just things like the cost of insurance for them and all that - it adds up SO MUCH. So, better that Dayton get here and get established with a JOB and can be pitching in with both the tasks and costs. And it would probably be a good idea for us to spend quality alone time together before being insta-family. Tomorrow is CeCe's birthday - hopefully I can reach her to wish her a good one. She'll be 10 years old! I definitely want her getting here before going to middle school - elementary would be a better placement for somebody suffering such culture shock. She's so resilient and I have no doubt that she will thrive here - but I would still like to mitigate the discomfort as much as possible.
My brain is full. I'm only eating dinner right now because I can't study anymore. I have my first practice exam tomorrow and I am SO not ready, but oh well. I don't have enough hours in this week to get everything done that I need to ... but it will all get done or it wasn't really necessary. It's like doing a marathon and once I get past that first hour or so, then something else kicks in that drives me forward. I like that whatever it is. Sometimes I feel it on the elliptical after the first 10 minutes, and I've read that's when the body shifts which fuel it's using.
Oh, about that, rat-a-hoo - I haven't lost any more weight since last weigh-in on Friday. I STILL haven't shed all the Jenny-visit weight. (I'm NOT blaming you Jenny, really!) I'm not giving up on South Beach - it's my goal to stick with it until final exams and Senegal. In two months I'll be in Senegal! Woo hoo!
OK, dinner's over and I have some Federal Rules of Civil Procedure to memorize tonight. But first, a shower. Why? Because I deserve it!
Should I go to the gym and blow off studying for an hour? Yes! I deserve it!
Should I buy the new pots I've been ogling for eternity? Yes! I deserve it!
Ah, it's a quality of life issue. I still haven't stopped fondling the kitchen island (which is more like a coastline in my little kitchen) that Ahmed helped me get. If I didn't have it, my quality of life would be sooooo much lower. And it's the same with the pots and pans - they are WONDERFUL! And, everybody in line and the salesclerk told me, too. I've been cooking up a storm with 'em and they are everything I expected and more. I even found a Foreman grill for sale which I got, too, because while I don't much like cleaning the thing, it does SUCH a great job of cooking up meat and reducing the fat.
Why aren't men like that, being all I expected and more? OK, Dayton of late has been the perfect long-distant boyfriend. We'll see how long THAT lasts, but I can't complain right now. We made a pretty serious decision that he'll come without the girls and they'll come later. I was feeling really overwhelmed with just these logistics of how to get them enrolled in a good school in this district that doesn't have enough teachers and there are all these horror stories of schools here right now. And even just things like the cost of insurance for them and all that - it adds up SO MUCH. So, better that Dayton get here and get established with a JOB and can be pitching in with both the tasks and costs. And it would probably be a good idea for us to spend quality alone time together before being insta-family. Tomorrow is CeCe's birthday - hopefully I can reach her to wish her a good one. She'll be 10 years old! I definitely want her getting here before going to middle school - elementary would be a better placement for somebody suffering such culture shock. She's so resilient and I have no doubt that she will thrive here - but I would still like to mitigate the discomfort as much as possible.
My brain is full. I'm only eating dinner right now because I can't study anymore. I have my first practice exam tomorrow and I am SO not ready, but oh well. I don't have enough hours in this week to get everything done that I need to ... but it will all get done or it wasn't really necessary. It's like doing a marathon and once I get past that first hour or so, then something else kicks in that drives me forward. I like that whatever it is. Sometimes I feel it on the elliptical after the first 10 minutes, and I've read that's when the body shifts which fuel it's using.
Oh, about that, rat-a-hoo - I haven't lost any more weight since last weigh-in on Friday. I STILL haven't shed all the Jenny-visit weight. (I'm NOT blaming you Jenny, really!) I'm not giving up on South Beach - it's my goal to stick with it until final exams and Senegal. In two months I'll be in Senegal! Woo hoo!
OK, dinner's over and I have some Federal Rules of Civil Procedure to memorize tonight. But first, a shower. Why? Because I deserve it!
Friday, October 13, 2006
aspartame makes my face numb
Why on EARTH am I consuming aspartame, anybody who knows my aversion to it would ask.
Because I'm a good South Beach slave. Yum, sugar-free jello.
Forget the consequences, I'm living in the 21st century and my body is pounds of pollution and plastics already.
Especially now. In a very "radishes in the cupboard" moment, I burned all my pots and pans. I keep them in the section below the oven, which in electric ovens is a good storage place. Mine, however, is a gas oven and that is the broiler section. So when I was trying to broil salmon last week, the horrible stench that I thought was new oven smell - nope, it was the glass on the lids shattering and the plastic handles reconfiguring and the teflon coating turning to something even more carcinogenic. Of course I didn't realize it until I went to use said pots the next day. The stench is almost gone, nearly a week later. Oy vey. This is what happens when my mind is on other things.
I have a stalker, which is the point of this. She creeps me out. (No, not the eyebrow-shifting Australian snob, who laid in wait for me to walk to Russian together today but I blew him off with a "nyet.") The first time I spoke to this stalker, it was pretty evident that she'd listened to everything I'd ever said in her vicinity and that she had attributed meanings to them that I generally didn't have. You know, like I'm the doll and she's the voice. I was avoiding her before that anyway, just because I didn't get the best vibe from her. I hear my mother's voice in my head that says I'm being unfair, she's a nice person, and maybe I just don't like her because she's not very attractive.
My mother's voice continues to be very wrong. Now the stalker is regularly upset with me that we're not best friends. She tried once to bring me candy, and slapped the guy next to me who ate it when I gave it to him. "You're not the one whose love and affection I'm trying to gain!" she snapped at him. Yeah, it was a SWF moment. She's moved closer to me in the two classes in which she could to be sitting WAY too close to me. Yesterday she insisted on poking me without stop until I snapped, "That's the reason I don't teach 8th graders anymore!" Today I was talking to somebody else and she was talking about me literally behind my back, repeatedly using my name and attributing things to me that I have no conception of. All I heard was, "I had to come to class because I sit next to [Insert My Name Here], and I knew she would be upset with me if I didn't come to class." Upset? Please. In that DO NOT CARE SPACE. Earlier this week when I went to Spanish class and sat down near where a bag was she said, "I knew you loved me! You're sitting next to me! You pretend to hate me, but I knew you loved me!" I replied, "I never gave thought to any of that at all. Still don't." I don't know her bag and I don't care where I sit. LEAVE ME ALONE!
Those kinds of things one at a time, I can take. Like when Color Ankh girl (she has an Ankh tattooed on the back of her neck) said one day to me, "Where are you going?" "To class! Late!" "Fine! It wasn't like I was going to ask you to come with me anyway!" - that I can handle because she's usually really normal and that's a joke - we usually have nice conversations and she wears pink cowboy boots and has a sex vibe so thick she had to be a burlesque star in her last life. But this stalker chick, it's this constant attention that I do not want.
And after surviving the indignities of student body elections, now we are voting for Prom Queen and King at the Barristers' Ball. Several of my classmates are skipping class next Friday in order to get ready for the ball. Son of Deepo-Provera Inventor said, "I'll be up all night so I have to nap all day. I can't be bothered to come to class then!"
I feel ... old. Some of my classmates I like and find them enjoyable, but the whole society is creepy. I spend as little time there as possible - seeking to escape into a world of sanity and reality, not surrounded by 23-year-old Midwestern boys looking for a Mrs who likes anal, and approaching all females to find out who she will be. Not surrounded by professors with drinking problems. The drinking culture is OVERWHELMING. It's not just the kids who miss class because of hangovers or who manage to stumble in still green at the gills - we've been told numerous times that the best things happen professionally with a drink in one's hand.
Well, if I were still 23, then I wouldn't mind so much because I used to put away quite a lot myself. But my liver is already pickled and I have to worry about thyroid issues and uterine masses and potential cervical cancer and blood sugar levels and cholesterol and all sorts of other things. It's not that I'm really so old, it's just that I'm different. I don't want to be a part of a world that revolves around drinking and excludes everybody who isn't one of us. Just as my classmates build taller and taller walls to keep out everyone who isn't a lawyer, I deconstruct all the walls to keep finding non-lawyers in my life.
I still have to get a a really high-paying job when I graduate, but I'm going to have to get hired on merits other than my off-color jokes at the cocktail parties.
Hopefully my face won't still be numb then.
Because I'm a good South Beach slave. Yum, sugar-free jello.
Forget the consequences, I'm living in the 21st century and my body is pounds of pollution and plastics already.
Especially now. In a very "radishes in the cupboard" moment, I burned all my pots and pans. I keep them in the section below the oven, which in electric ovens is a good storage place. Mine, however, is a gas oven and that is the broiler section. So when I was trying to broil salmon last week, the horrible stench that I thought was new oven smell - nope, it was the glass on the lids shattering and the plastic handles reconfiguring and the teflon coating turning to something even more carcinogenic. Of course I didn't realize it until I went to use said pots the next day. The stench is almost gone, nearly a week later. Oy vey. This is what happens when my mind is on other things.
I have a stalker, which is the point of this. She creeps me out. (No, not the eyebrow-shifting Australian snob, who laid in wait for me to walk to Russian together today but I blew him off with a "nyet.") The first time I spoke to this stalker, it was pretty evident that she'd listened to everything I'd ever said in her vicinity and that she had attributed meanings to them that I generally didn't have. You know, like I'm the doll and she's the voice. I was avoiding her before that anyway, just because I didn't get the best vibe from her. I hear my mother's voice in my head that says I'm being unfair, she's a nice person, and maybe I just don't like her because she's not very attractive.
My mother's voice continues to be very wrong. Now the stalker is regularly upset with me that we're not best friends. She tried once to bring me candy, and slapped the guy next to me who ate it when I gave it to him. "You're not the one whose love and affection I'm trying to gain!" she snapped at him. Yeah, it was a SWF moment. She's moved closer to me in the two classes in which she could to be sitting WAY too close to me. Yesterday she insisted on poking me without stop until I snapped, "That's the reason I don't teach 8th graders anymore!" Today I was talking to somebody else and she was talking about me literally behind my back, repeatedly using my name and attributing things to me that I have no conception of. All I heard was, "I had to come to class because I sit next to [Insert My Name Here], and I knew she would be upset with me if I didn't come to class." Upset? Please. In that DO NOT CARE SPACE. Earlier this week when I went to Spanish class and sat down near where a bag was she said, "I knew you loved me! You're sitting next to me! You pretend to hate me, but I knew you loved me!" I replied, "I never gave thought to any of that at all. Still don't." I don't know her bag and I don't care where I sit. LEAVE ME ALONE!
Those kinds of things one at a time, I can take. Like when Color Ankh girl (she has an Ankh tattooed on the back of her neck) said one day to me, "Where are you going?" "To class! Late!" "Fine! It wasn't like I was going to ask you to come with me anyway!" - that I can handle because she's usually really normal and that's a joke - we usually have nice conversations and she wears pink cowboy boots and has a sex vibe so thick she had to be a burlesque star in her last life. But this stalker chick, it's this constant attention that I do not want.
And after surviving the indignities of student body elections, now we are voting for Prom Queen and King at the Barristers' Ball. Several of my classmates are skipping class next Friday in order to get ready for the ball. Son of Deepo-Provera Inventor said, "I'll be up all night so I have to nap all day. I can't be bothered to come to class then!"
I feel ... old. Some of my classmates I like and find them enjoyable, but the whole society is creepy. I spend as little time there as possible - seeking to escape into a world of sanity and reality, not surrounded by 23-year-old Midwestern boys looking for a Mrs who likes anal, and approaching all females to find out who she will be. Not surrounded by professors with drinking problems. The drinking culture is OVERWHELMING. It's not just the kids who miss class because of hangovers or who manage to stumble in still green at the gills - we've been told numerous times that the best things happen professionally with a drink in one's hand.
Well, if I were still 23, then I wouldn't mind so much because I used to put away quite a lot myself. But my liver is already pickled and I have to worry about thyroid issues and uterine masses and potential cervical cancer and blood sugar levels and cholesterol and all sorts of other things. It's not that I'm really so old, it's just that I'm different. I don't want to be a part of a world that revolves around drinking and excludes everybody who isn't one of us. Just as my classmates build taller and taller walls to keep out everyone who isn't a lawyer, I deconstruct all the walls to keep finding non-lawyers in my life.
I still have to get a a really high-paying job when I graduate, but I'm going to have to get hired on merits other than my off-color jokes at the cocktail parties.
Hopefully my face won't still be numb then.
don't be late to class!
Because then you might be tempted to run up the stairs to get there and trip and stub your toe so bad the end scrapes off and you leave a trail of blood where you go.
Or is that just me?
So I went to the student health center and they fixed it up and I got a "pedicure tub" to boot. (no pun intended)
And I weighed myself, and according to their scale, almost 4 pounds less than 1.5 weeks ago when I was last weighed there, so not bad for day 5. Not to sound like a South Beach commercial or anything, and I would be a lot more skeptical if it hadn't worked for me before. Sticking to it is the toughest part, but it does work - I've pretty much kept off the 20 pounds I lost with it almost two years ago. But weightloss through calorie cutting doesn't stay off for me - just jumps back on with the first beignet I eye.
Go cashews, go cashews, go cashews.
OK, time to NOT be late to this next class.
Or is that just me?
So I went to the student health center and they fixed it up and I got a "pedicure tub" to boot. (no pun intended)
And I weighed myself, and according to their scale, almost 4 pounds less than 1.5 weeks ago when I was last weighed there, so not bad for day 5. Not to sound like a South Beach commercial or anything, and I would be a lot more skeptical if it hadn't worked for me before. Sticking to it is the toughest part, but it does work - I've pretty much kept off the 20 pounds I lost with it almost two years ago. But weightloss through calorie cutting doesn't stay off for me - just jumps back on with the first beignet I eye.
Go cashews, go cashews, go cashews.
OK, time to NOT be late to this next class.
Thursday, October 12, 2006
almost Friday.
I made it through the toughest day of the week - my first teaching evening. It was fine and I actually was right on the script until the last half hour when I sped up. Three of the eight actually stayed 15 minutes over to work through more problems with me. One laughed about being such a nerd, and I said, "Oh, no, no!" but I was thinking, hell yeah.
They were all really nice people and I think I will continue to find it enjoyable. Only actually 7 more sessions with them. Two of the boys think they're all that because they scored their LSAT's in the 150's. I'm just glad that none of them was close to my score or I would have felt insecure. I can't believe this class costs like almost $1300 for them to take. Trust me, I ain't making all that. Of course, I'm also just the grunt - the test prep folks put a lot of effort into making the materials and everything else. I can't really complain about the pay, and they pay me for prep time. And while it's taxing to be on my feet for over 4 hours without a break, talking the whole time, it's adults who want to be there so I have none of the 8th grade behavior issues to deal with that can take a lot of energy. The two boys who are oh-so-wise, well, I've been teaching long enough to just take that in stride. Worst case scenario, they complain and I get fired. Um, yeah, so I'm heartbroken. The site manager is a newly hired raving bitch, but she's way sucking up to me right now. I'll start avoiding her so we don't fall out.
Hopefully I can take the whole thing in stride - all those hours spent teaching and prepping instead of studying - hopefully it all works as I planned, to make me more time-efficient.
It's almost Friday.
Day 4 of South Beach, significantly less painful than day 3 where I was ravenously hungry. 10 more days to go, and then I'll get to eat some bread and rice and pasta again (the way I keep my food bills down usually). I wanted to kill the carb cravings and even out my blood sugar, so two weeks of strict South Beach will hopefully do that for me. Well, not totally strict - there were some breadcrumbs in the salmon patty I bought which I didn't realize, and my salad dressing might have some sugar in it, and I eat more nuts than allowed - but I'm being pretty "good" so far. I totally protein-loaded at breakfast with turkey bacon and salmon/asparagus scrambled egg. This must make Tami's stomach hurl, but I didn't die of starvation so it's good.
OK, I can get some work done now I hope. It's another long day tomorrow, with four classes (five really, but I'm skipping Russian so that I can eat lunch). And I have two practice exams next week and two the following, which has me ultra-stressed-out because while I go to class prepared, I'm not at all prepared for exams. That's what Sunday's for.
And so is the life of a law student. I will not crack this week. Teaching is just the ticket, because for those four hours, I *can't* be studying, and I *can't* be eating carbs, and I *can't* be text messaging Dayton. Way to keep my mind off things. So far, so good.
They were all really nice people and I think I will continue to find it enjoyable. Only actually 7 more sessions with them. Two of the boys think they're all that because they scored their LSAT's in the 150's. I'm just glad that none of them was close to my score or I would have felt insecure. I can't believe this class costs like almost $1300 for them to take. Trust me, I ain't making all that. Of course, I'm also just the grunt - the test prep folks put a lot of effort into making the materials and everything else. I can't really complain about the pay, and they pay me for prep time. And while it's taxing to be on my feet for over 4 hours without a break, talking the whole time, it's adults who want to be there so I have none of the 8th grade behavior issues to deal with that can take a lot of energy. The two boys who are oh-so-wise, well, I've been teaching long enough to just take that in stride. Worst case scenario, they complain and I get fired. Um, yeah, so I'm heartbroken. The site manager is a newly hired raving bitch, but she's way sucking up to me right now. I'll start avoiding her so we don't fall out.
Hopefully I can take the whole thing in stride - all those hours spent teaching and prepping instead of studying - hopefully it all works as I planned, to make me more time-efficient.
It's almost Friday.
Day 4 of South Beach, significantly less painful than day 3 where I was ravenously hungry. 10 more days to go, and then I'll get to eat some bread and rice and pasta again (the way I keep my food bills down usually). I wanted to kill the carb cravings and even out my blood sugar, so two weeks of strict South Beach will hopefully do that for me. Well, not totally strict - there were some breadcrumbs in the salmon patty I bought which I didn't realize, and my salad dressing might have some sugar in it, and I eat more nuts than allowed - but I'm being pretty "good" so far. I totally protein-loaded at breakfast with turkey bacon and salmon/asparagus scrambled egg. This must make Tami's stomach hurl, but I didn't die of starvation so it's good.
OK, I can get some work done now I hope. It's another long day tomorrow, with four classes (five really, but I'm skipping Russian so that I can eat lunch). And I have two practice exams next week and two the following, which has me ultra-stressed-out because while I go to class prepared, I'm not at all prepared for exams. That's what Sunday's for.
And so is the life of a law student. I will not crack this week. Teaching is just the ticket, because for those four hours, I *can't* be studying, and I *can't* be eating carbs, and I *can't* be text messaging Dayton. Way to keep my mind off things. So far, so good.
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
another Wednesday down
If misery loves company, it would fit right in here at First Choice Law School.
"I've seen so many people crack this week!" says classmate Sylvia.
Well, thank goodness it's not just me.
Not the best time to start a new job that's taking me 20 hours a week, but I'll survive. I always do.
Sorry I'm incommunicado. Trust me, it's better that way for everybody. I'm on Day 3 of the South Beach Diet (which costs me a FORTUNE to shop for, so there's no way I'm falling off the wagon), and I'm so hungry and grumpy. I'm not supposed to be, but I am. I probably ate a pound of cashews today. I'm supposed to eat about 20 as a snack, but that just wasn't cutting it. Salad isn't cutting it. Salmon isn't cutting it. See, the reason that in my real life I eat those 600-calorie muffins on Wednesdays is because they help me make it through the brutal day. Those calories sustain me. I only hope that my body shifts into fat-burning metabolism soon.
Back to Torts and Civil Procedure.
"I've seen so many people crack this week!" says classmate Sylvia.
Well, thank goodness it's not just me.
Not the best time to start a new job that's taking me 20 hours a week, but I'll survive. I always do.
Sorry I'm incommunicado. Trust me, it's better that way for everybody. I'm on Day 3 of the South Beach Diet (which costs me a FORTUNE to shop for, so there's no way I'm falling off the wagon), and I'm so hungry and grumpy. I'm not supposed to be, but I am. I probably ate a pound of cashews today. I'm supposed to eat about 20 as a snack, but that just wasn't cutting it. Salad isn't cutting it. Salmon isn't cutting it. See, the reason that in my real life I eat those 600-calorie muffins on Wednesdays is because they help me make it through the brutal day. Those calories sustain me. I only hope that my body shifts into fat-burning metabolism soon.
Back to Torts and Civil Procedure.
Sunday, October 08, 2006
Sunspotted
Gretna Fest was great! I got my Sunpie fix (yeah, I do have a crush on him, I must admit) and Rebirth enough that my right eardrum is blown out and white beans and rice with fried catfish. A good day in Louisiana. It's the one place in the world where even the old white men have a great sense of rhythm and can dance. I love the South for its embrace of quirky people who are completely unselfconscious. Every day is a Flannery O'Connor short story (except when at First Choice Law School - where the cookie-cutter trend is as bad as SoCal).
My schedule is so tight for the next ... two and a half months that I have every hour planned for this week. I left Rebirth early so that I can fix in some time to go to the bathroom and maybe even shower off this festival sweat and grime. And, oh yeah, blog.
So, when I asked last month, "When is it going to get challenging? When is it going to get busy?"
Now, blog friends, now.
And in interests of full disclosure, Dayton and I are trying to work things through, though I hold less than 100% hope. I just can't kill that he feels like home, but I'm running out of patience with crosscultural discontinuities.
OK, I blocked out three hours to do about 10 hours of work for my new Test Prep job (very labor-intensive, though I will get paid for it). When I didn't prep for Saturday, I really pushed the patience limits with supervisor-classmate (who scored points with me when he said the reason he doesn't like Austin is that there it's "too white" but lost points when I realized that he was born when I was in 8th grade), so it's time to be a good girl. For awhile.
My schedule is so tight for the next ... two and a half months that I have every hour planned for this week. I left Rebirth early so that I can fix in some time to go to the bathroom and maybe even shower off this festival sweat and grime. And, oh yeah, blog.
So, when I asked last month, "When is it going to get challenging? When is it going to get busy?"
Now, blog friends, now.
And in interests of full disclosure, Dayton and I are trying to work things through, though I hold less than 100% hope. I just can't kill that he feels like home, but I'm running out of patience with crosscultural discontinuities.
OK, I blocked out three hours to do about 10 hours of work for my new Test Prep job (very labor-intensive, though I will get paid for it). When I didn't prep for Saturday, I really pushed the patience limits with supervisor-classmate (who scored points with me when he said the reason he doesn't like Austin is that there it's "too white" but lost points when I realized that he was born when I was in 8th grade), so it's time to be a good girl. For awhile.
Saturday, October 07, 2006
two weeks carb-free
OK, if I post it, I have to do it.
Two weeks on South Beach starts Monday (after tomorrow's festival, and then shopping & cooking). My carb cravings are out of control (can we say SUBLIMATION), and I can't shake the 5 pounds I gained when Jenny was here. I am the only person I know who can gain 5 pounds in a long weekend - and it's not like we ate a cheesecake a day or anything. Sure, there were beignets, but it's not like falafel is 10,000 calories each.
So I emailed one of my classmates who lives alone and asked her if I can hide food at her place. Goodbye, whole-wheat pasta, jam, pretzels, etc. Fare ye well.
It's definitely cooled off here, after last week's little heatwave, and it's a welcome relief to not be running any air conditioning. I have my front door open, enjoying the little breeze, and I continue to procrastinate what MUST BE DONE.
Two weeks on South Beach starts Monday (after tomorrow's festival, and then shopping & cooking). My carb cravings are out of control (can we say SUBLIMATION), and I can't shake the 5 pounds I gained when Jenny was here. I am the only person I know who can gain 5 pounds in a long weekend - and it's not like we ate a cheesecake a day or anything. Sure, there were beignets, but it's not like falafel is 10,000 calories each.
So I emailed one of my classmates who lives alone and asked her if I can hide food at her place. Goodbye, whole-wheat pasta, jam, pretzels, etc. Fare ye well.
It's definitely cooled off here, after last week's little heatwave, and it's a welcome relief to not be running any air conditioning. I have my front door open, enjoying the little breeze, and I continue to procrastinate what MUST BE DONE.
etymology
Recent email response to my email asking Superdome Puerto Rican what the reading for next Spanish class is-
Hola [insert my name here]:
Estoy muy ocupado en preparación para mi próxima visita a Wal-Mart. Pero saque tiempo para enviarte la asignación. Espero que vayas a clase preparada.
Muchísimas gracias,
[His name here]
He is, as I told him, plain wicked in his sense of humor.
But the cool part is that I didn't know the word "saque" - but it looks like it's related to "loot." I always wondered where loot and sack, the sack came from. Is it related? Could be. How exciting!
Which is what my Test Preparation Supervisor (also my classmate, and yes, it's weird) said today - that I can get excited about anything, and drag them all along. Yup. That's what I get for a decade in the public school trenches. I've taught gerunds, I can get excited about anything.
And I feel like crap. Is it West Nile virus?
Hola [insert my name here]:
Estoy muy ocupado en preparación para mi próxima visita a Wal-Mart. Pero saque tiempo para enviarte la asignación. Espero que vayas a clase preparada.
Muchísimas gracias,
[His name here]
He is, as I told him, plain wicked in his sense of humor.
But the cool part is that I didn't know the word "saque" - but it looks like it's related to "loot." I always wondered where loot and sack, the sack came from. Is it related? Could be. How exciting!
Which is what my Test Preparation Supervisor (also my classmate, and yes, it's weird) said today - that I can get excited about anything, and drag them all along. Yup. That's what I get for a decade in the public school trenches. I've taught gerunds, I can get excited about anything.
And I feel like crap. Is it West Nile virus?
Friday, October 06, 2006
we got 15
As I was out watering the yard (which I HATE doing anywhere, but whatever), I noticed that two houses down is for sale. So, I went over to peek in the windows.
A Yorkie viciously barked and a woman came out of the nearby FEMA trailer. She thought I was somebody else, but graciously showed me her house for sale.
It's for sale because her husband is divorcing and she can't afford to buy him out. Today is their 17th wedding anniversary. I said, because what else could I say?, "I'm so sorry." "Yeah, me too. I'm sorry, it's just a really bad day all aroun for me. But, I have my health, and two wonderful children."
It's $240,000, which is just land value she says. It's totally gutted and down to frame, and it even looked newly wired and plumbed. It's 2200 square feet with three bedrooms plus a den and a nice fenced-in backyard with a pool which is actually in good shape. I love it. I want it. I can't have it. I don't ever want to be in her position.
They got 15 inches, which it took me a few minutes to understand what she was saying. 15 inches of floodwater. Did 15 destroy 17?
Earlier I went to Norwood's house cuz I miss him and wondered how his house is doing - it looks great - he just put in all new windows. He's insulating and sheetrocking starting tonight. I wish my weekend weren't so packed, but I'll get over there for some of the fun times.
My best times in New Orleans so far were when I was staying with Tami, trying a new nationality of dining each evening, and volunteering at Habitat with Norwood and Kim and Keith and the boys. That's real New Orleans. Over here right by First Choice Law School, it's people from Georgia and Alabama and Michigan and Arkansas. It's not New Orleans and it's not even Louisiana.
There are such benefits to living a 5 minute walk to campus, and it's great for my environmental and karmic conscience. But part of me wants to go live next door to Norwood or other New Orleanians. Real New Orleanians. After this year I'll only have class four days a week, so maybe I can justify the commute more. Maybe I'll convince Norwood to let me move in. Kim would let me. Maybe I can just live in his FEMA trailer when he moves out - it's about the size of my apartment now.
A Yorkie viciously barked and a woman came out of the nearby FEMA trailer. She thought I was somebody else, but graciously showed me her house for sale.
It's for sale because her husband is divorcing and she can't afford to buy him out. Today is their 17th wedding anniversary. I said, because what else could I say?, "I'm so sorry." "Yeah, me too. I'm sorry, it's just a really bad day all aroun for me. But, I have my health, and two wonderful children."
It's $240,000, which is just land value she says. It's totally gutted and down to frame, and it even looked newly wired and plumbed. It's 2200 square feet with three bedrooms plus a den and a nice fenced-in backyard with a pool which is actually in good shape. I love it. I want it. I can't have it. I don't ever want to be in her position.
They got 15 inches, which it took me a few minutes to understand what she was saying. 15 inches of floodwater. Did 15 destroy 17?
Earlier I went to Norwood's house cuz I miss him and wondered how his house is doing - it looks great - he just put in all new windows. He's insulating and sheetrocking starting tonight. I wish my weekend weren't so packed, but I'll get over there for some of the fun times.
My best times in New Orleans so far were when I was staying with Tami, trying a new nationality of dining each evening, and volunteering at Habitat with Norwood and Kim and Keith and the boys. That's real New Orleans. Over here right by First Choice Law School, it's people from Georgia and Alabama and Michigan and Arkansas. It's not New Orleans and it's not even Louisiana.
There are such benefits to living a 5 minute walk to campus, and it's great for my environmental and karmic conscience. But part of me wants to go live next door to Norwood or other New Orleanians. Real New Orleanians. After this year I'll only have class four days a week, so maybe I can justify the commute more. Maybe I'll convince Norwood to let me move in. Kim would let me. Maybe I can just live in his FEMA trailer when he moves out - it's about the size of my apartment now.
best walk home ever
Why? Well, it wasn't the four casebooks I was hauling home, with designs to have The Most Productive Weekend Ever (despite plans to be a Sunpie groupie on Sunday and a Test Prep Ho on Saturday).
It was because the one house on my walk that ALWAYS has trash blocking the sidewalk was all cleaned up today. They even seemed to sweep up the broken mirror and the cable ends that I leap to avoid. Beauty.
And, I got to WALK ON The Most Beautiful Sidewalk Ever. Some guy called it that - clearly the guy who poured it - as I walked around when it was fresh. He shouted that from his pickup as he was driving past, so it was a little strange and stalkeresque, but now I get it. It is a beautiful sidewalk. Today was the first time I've ever walked from or to school without a number of barriers to get around. Wow. Does this mean hurdles in my life are evaporating? Is it a sign? One can only hope, though I will be on pins and needles for the next four weeks until my writing assignment is returned.
Smarmy Australian guy gave me the eyebrows today. Twice. Very creepy. He's spent too long in the former Soviet Union (we were in Russian class). I think he was just trying to appear to not be a stuck-up snob, but too late. When he says things like, "This goddamn fucking city that deserves to be sucked into the ocean!" he's blown it with any chance of friendship with me - especially since the other student in there is a study in kind friendliness. I actually got suckered into speaking in Russian class today and the instructor (Belorussian Mafia guy) was taken aback at my accent. I'm obsessive about having a better accent than most Americans in every language I learn, which is to my detriment actually - because then people think I speak it a lot better than I do. I don't. I suck. I just don't sound like an American.
Which sometimes is more than enough.
It was because the one house on my walk that ALWAYS has trash blocking the sidewalk was all cleaned up today. They even seemed to sweep up the broken mirror and the cable ends that I leap to avoid. Beauty.
And, I got to WALK ON The Most Beautiful Sidewalk Ever. Some guy called it that - clearly the guy who poured it - as I walked around when it was fresh. He shouted that from his pickup as he was driving past, so it was a little strange and stalkeresque, but now I get it. It is a beautiful sidewalk. Today was the first time I've ever walked from or to school without a number of barriers to get around. Wow. Does this mean hurdles in my life are evaporating? Is it a sign? One can only hope, though I will be on pins and needles for the next four weeks until my writing assignment is returned.
Smarmy Australian guy gave me the eyebrows today. Twice. Very creepy. He's spent too long in the former Soviet Union (we were in Russian class). I think he was just trying to appear to not be a stuck-up snob, but too late. When he says things like, "This goddamn fucking city that deserves to be sucked into the ocean!" he's blown it with any chance of friendship with me - especially since the other student in there is a study in kind friendliness. I actually got suckered into speaking in Russian class today and the instructor (Belorussian Mafia guy) was taken aback at my accent. I'm obsessive about having a better accent than most Americans in every language I learn, which is to my detriment actually - because then people think I speak it a lot better than I do. I don't. I suck. I just don't sound like an American.
Which sometimes is more than enough.
life cycle of the mosquito
I hate false information! When I was at Habitat, the "medic" said, when I suggested that we not leave plastic lying around with water because mosquitos lay eggs there, that it takes about 48 days for them to hatch, so it's not a problem to not worry about it.
No, you moron. It can be 48 HOURS. http://www.mosquitoes.org/LifeCycle.html Or 10 days, it depends on the species and conditions. After hatching, they live in water a few days. A FEW DAYS.
The reason I'm obsessed? Well, besides all the confirmed West Nile cases in the area, I have a ton of mosquito bites because mosquitos are outside my front door like paparazzi around Madonna in Malawi right now. I finally bought some spray, and they seem to have taken the hint even before I sprayed.
No, you moron. It can be 48 HOURS. http://www.mosquitoes.org/LifeCycle.html Or 10 days, it depends on the species and conditions. After hatching, they live in water a few days. A FEW DAYS.
The reason I'm obsessed? Well, besides all the confirmed West Nile cases in the area, I have a ton of mosquito bites because mosquitos are outside my front door like paparazzi around Madonna in Malawi right now. I finally bought some spray, and they seem to have taken the hint even before I sprayed.
Thursday, October 05, 2006
feeling stressed?
Then how about you get another job and add an additional academic program? Or, is that just me?
My job starts next week, and it's two nights a week four hours at a time. The lesson plan book is so heavy I don't need to buy weights - I'll just carry it around. I have a bucketload of paperwork to do for it, but later. Not now. I'm so tired I just want to curl up with a good book, but I have bucketloads of homework.
I'm toying with the idea of adding a Masters degree program to my JD. In international development. The int. dev. program here just got a $4.3 million federal grant to examine child slave labor in African cocoa farms. OK, what in that grant does NOT appeal to me? I like money in the millions, I advocate for children, I'm opposed to slavery, I love Africa, and cocoa is the basis of my existence most days. So, I was thinking about starting up a conversation with them, maybe do some legwork for them somehow, and then I saw it - I could do a joint JD/MS in International Development. I emailed a law prof who is affiliated with them and I'll ask him questions if I can.
Why? Hello, do you know me? I have a good reason. Because none of my degrees have an "S" in them. I have a BA, and MEd, and after another 100K a JD. No S. Why not an MS?
No, but seriously - all the core classes in the Int Dev MS are things that interest me AND best of all - if I take summer school courses (which I was going to do anyway, though I need at least a month of legal experience this summer as well), I could finish BOTH degrees in three years, and hopefully not much more money (because how much more money can they extract from me??). If I do a joint degree, then the law school excuses like 10 credits and the other department excuses like 10, so it could be three years without killing myself.
What's the benefit? Well, nothing right away, since it's not what I want to do at first. But eventually, once debts are paid and all that, I'd love to do some legal work in developing countries. And the real benefit? Maybe there are hot guys over there in the International Development Program who are of legal age.
OK, so this job, it will almost pay for my trip to Senegal by the end of November. That doesn't suck. Because what that means is ANOTHER FUN TRIP NEXT SUMMER!! I think this job will be as tedious as the home instruction I did last year, so I have to keep my eye on the prize. Cameroon! Cameroon! Cameroon! (Not that I really care about going to Cameroon - I'm just running out of West African nations that won't kill me.) I should be realistic though and realize that what it will take me six weeks to earn now I can probably earn later in about four days as a lawyer. So, if it doesn't enhance the quality of my life, I won't keep doing it after this time.
And once I'm settled in here, I can be more streamlined with my time management. I just put up the last storage device (I got a slew at Lowe's which I always forget is SO CLOSE), so I'm almost done with all that and ready to actually just BE home instead of BUILD home.
My job starts next week, and it's two nights a week four hours at a time. The lesson plan book is so heavy I don't need to buy weights - I'll just carry it around. I have a bucketload of paperwork to do for it, but later. Not now. I'm so tired I just want to curl up with a good book, but I have bucketloads of homework.
I'm toying with the idea of adding a Masters degree program to my JD. In international development. The int. dev. program here just got a $4.3 million federal grant to examine child slave labor in African cocoa farms. OK, what in that grant does NOT appeal to me? I like money in the millions, I advocate for children, I'm opposed to slavery, I love Africa, and cocoa is the basis of my existence most days. So, I was thinking about starting up a conversation with them, maybe do some legwork for them somehow, and then I saw it - I could do a joint JD/MS in International Development. I emailed a law prof who is affiliated with them and I'll ask him questions if I can.
Why? Hello, do you know me? I have a good reason. Because none of my degrees have an "S" in them. I have a BA, and MEd, and after another 100K a JD. No S. Why not an MS?
No, but seriously - all the core classes in the Int Dev MS are things that interest me AND best of all - if I take summer school courses (which I was going to do anyway, though I need at least a month of legal experience this summer as well), I could finish BOTH degrees in three years, and hopefully not much more money (because how much more money can they extract from me??). If I do a joint degree, then the law school excuses like 10 credits and the other department excuses like 10, so it could be three years without killing myself.
What's the benefit? Well, nothing right away, since it's not what I want to do at first. But eventually, once debts are paid and all that, I'd love to do some legal work in developing countries. And the real benefit? Maybe there are hot guys over there in the International Development Program who are of legal age.
OK, so this job, it will almost pay for my trip to Senegal by the end of November. That doesn't suck. Because what that means is ANOTHER FUN TRIP NEXT SUMMER!! I think this job will be as tedious as the home instruction I did last year, so I have to keep my eye on the prize. Cameroon! Cameroon! Cameroon! (Not that I really care about going to Cameroon - I'm just running out of West African nations that won't kill me.) I should be realistic though and realize that what it will take me six weeks to earn now I can probably earn later in about four days as a lawyer. So, if it doesn't enhance the quality of my life, I won't keep doing it after this time.
And once I'm settled in here, I can be more streamlined with my time management. I just put up the last storage device (I got a slew at Lowe's which I always forget is SO CLOSE), so I'm almost done with all that and ready to actually just BE home instead of BUILD home.
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
piety with parsley in my falafel
I went to Pyramids today - it was a really long day of class and meetings since 8:30 this morning until 8:10 tonight, interspersed with moving, but most my really important paper due (more on that below). So I went to Pyramids for a quick fix.
Yes, I knew it's Ramadan. But I figured if the restaurant is open that it's not in bad taste for me to eat there. I'm supporting Ramadan indirectly, but supporting the owners who are fasting.
OK, so I just really wanted some falafel. So I'm an infidel.
The owner saw me from the kitchen. He's usually friendly in that sort of friendly to everybody way. But today he came and sat and told me all about the Koran.
"Jesus spoke his first day of life. Does your Bible tell you that? We have it there. He was a prophet, one of the greats. Everybody is born Muslim, but if their parents are Jewish or Christian, they lead them that way. But everybody is born Muslim. Jesus was Muslim."
And so on.
Now, Ahmed if you're reading, don't be embarrassed like you are about the woman in Jordan who yelled at me for drinking a soda during Ramadan. No single Muslim or Arab represents anybody else.
This is what happens when people fast for 30 days, working over a hot stove all day and reading the Koran all night. They get pious, they get devout, and they want to share their enthusiasm. They also get short-tempered and lose their attention span - more car crashes during Ramadan in Turkey than any other time.
And I'm such a bad listener, with no excuse for my short attention span, and I kept thinking, "When will he go away so I can drink that Diet Coke she just dropped off?" I'm not drinking or eating in front of somebody going through Ramadan. Anymore.
But it's so cool that all sort of different people with different kinds of faiths can communicate.
And then the kitchen worker came out after I placed my order, apparently sizing me up before he fried my falafel. And yeah, he could go under my cute boys post.
So, I spent much of the day continuing to retool my memo due today. And now I wish I'd done more, because a 2L told me that last year she got a D on that assignment. A D. And she says that this instructor gives a lot of D's and F's. OH MY GOD. Now I'm pious. This is not my former cushy existence, where an A- was cause for crisis. Oh no, those days are long past.
Well, it's only 15% of my grade, and the next assignment is 40%, so I'll do better on it. I hope. The thing is that I'm not in school with slackers and idiots. Damn it.
My job will actually begin next week, and it will be two evenings a week, no weekends, and longer - so more money overall. My goal had been to use my time better during the days, so this will force me to. I think I can do it - I'll prep on weekends and then about six hours during the week - that's reasonable. My supervisor was very nearly begging me today, which is always a nice position to be in. The pay doesn't suck too bad, and the hours are good, and I think it'll be really easy for me, and it will be some nice extra cash. But really, it's about perspective - my whole life cannot be law school or I will go insane. This is an opportunity for something different. And I'll see how I like it, and if I don't, then I won't do it again.
Before and after him begging me, I realized how I enjoy the people all around me in my Legal Research and Writing class. We are this fluid support group and we make each other laugh. It's the only class with any group work at all, and all of us are in other classes with each other, so it's the one "fun" class. Fun in that root-canal kind of way.
So, I've brought everything over from the other apartment except my maps and plastic bags. I have some unpacking to do tonight, and I've got Marc Anthony salsaing me through it.
Oh, so I have hot water from two of three taps, which is a big step forward. AND, I was able to rush back here quick enough to turn the power back off before Entergy got here. He pulled up as I was walking away to class, and that was cool. Including seeing that two of the fuses are totally blown in the box.
"Robin, it's me again. Um, this electricity - was it the same contractor? Did they just rewire the whole house? Um, there are some problems. Want to hear them now or later?"
When I asked her if she wanted the check I gave her before to be a deposit or rent for October, she said, "I don't know your financial situation. Do whatever is best for you and let me know." That's the kind of thing that I would expect of a Jordanian, that sort of helpfulness and devoutness manifested in love of humans. So, there's my Arab stereotype of the day, and I'll let it stand.
Yes, I knew it's Ramadan. But I figured if the restaurant is open that it's not in bad taste for me to eat there. I'm supporting Ramadan indirectly, but supporting the owners who are fasting.
OK, so I just really wanted some falafel. So I'm an infidel.
The owner saw me from the kitchen. He's usually friendly in that sort of friendly to everybody way. But today he came and sat and told me all about the Koran.
"Jesus spoke his first day of life. Does your Bible tell you that? We have it there. He was a prophet, one of the greats. Everybody is born Muslim, but if their parents are Jewish or Christian, they lead them that way. But everybody is born Muslim. Jesus was Muslim."
And so on.
Now, Ahmed if you're reading, don't be embarrassed like you are about the woman in Jordan who yelled at me for drinking a soda during Ramadan. No single Muslim or Arab represents anybody else.
This is what happens when people fast for 30 days, working over a hot stove all day and reading the Koran all night. They get pious, they get devout, and they want to share their enthusiasm. They also get short-tempered and lose their attention span - more car crashes during Ramadan in Turkey than any other time.
And I'm such a bad listener, with no excuse for my short attention span, and I kept thinking, "When will he go away so I can drink that Diet Coke she just dropped off?" I'm not drinking or eating in front of somebody going through Ramadan. Anymore.
But it's so cool that all sort of different people with different kinds of faiths can communicate.
And then the kitchen worker came out after I placed my order, apparently sizing me up before he fried my falafel. And yeah, he could go under my cute boys post.
So, I spent much of the day continuing to retool my memo due today. And now I wish I'd done more, because a 2L told me that last year she got a D on that assignment. A D. And she says that this instructor gives a lot of D's and F's. OH MY GOD. Now I'm pious. This is not my former cushy existence, where an A- was cause for crisis. Oh no, those days are long past.
Well, it's only 15% of my grade, and the next assignment is 40%, so I'll do better on it. I hope. The thing is that I'm not in school with slackers and idiots. Damn it.
My job will actually begin next week, and it will be two evenings a week, no weekends, and longer - so more money overall. My goal had been to use my time better during the days, so this will force me to. I think I can do it - I'll prep on weekends and then about six hours during the week - that's reasonable. My supervisor was very nearly begging me today, which is always a nice position to be in. The pay doesn't suck too bad, and the hours are good, and I think it'll be really easy for me, and it will be some nice extra cash. But really, it's about perspective - my whole life cannot be law school or I will go insane. This is an opportunity for something different. And I'll see how I like it, and if I don't, then I won't do it again.
Before and after him begging me, I realized how I enjoy the people all around me in my Legal Research and Writing class. We are this fluid support group and we make each other laugh. It's the only class with any group work at all, and all of us are in other classes with each other, so it's the one "fun" class. Fun in that root-canal kind of way.
So, I've brought everything over from the other apartment except my maps and plastic bags. I have some unpacking to do tonight, and I've got Marc Anthony salsaing me through it.
Oh, so I have hot water from two of three taps, which is a big step forward. AND, I was able to rush back here quick enough to turn the power back off before Entergy got here. He pulled up as I was walking away to class, and that was cool. Including seeing that two of the fuses are totally blown in the box.
"Robin, it's me again. Um, this electricity - was it the same contractor? Did they just rewire the whole house? Um, there are some problems. Want to hear them now or later?"
When I asked her if she wanted the check I gave her before to be a deposit or rent for October, she said, "I don't know your financial situation. Do whatever is best for you and let me know." That's the kind of thing that I would expect of a Jordanian, that sort of helpfulness and devoutness manifested in love of humans. So, there's my Arab stereotype of the day, and I'll let it stand.
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
cute boys
There's a very cute boy who sits next to me in Torts - he introduced himself a few weeks back. Cute like a golden Lab puppy, with an adorable accent, and a smile that's like when you come back to the dog you left sitting in your car in the grocery store parking lot.
Today he wasn't there, and when I saw him later he looked tired and disheveled - after he greeted me, I heard him say to another that he had been working on the big assignment due today/tomorrow. The young girls, they adore him - he always has a flock of blond thangs surrounding him.
Man, I'm loving that I was all stressed about that big assignment at the end of last week in order to get questions in to the instructor before they cut us off at noon Saturday, and I rewrote the whole thing from scratch yesterday. All I have is some more fine-tuning tonight and tomorrow, but then I have to be done because it's time to move on. The more I revise the sentences the worse they become, which is why I rewrote the whole damn thing. I'm not going to do it again. I'm losing perspective.
Anyway, then I left out the building down the street, heading home, and I heard my last name being shouted. There he was, looking like Selma when I've left her somewhere behind, except more sheepish then Selma ever usually looks. (Selma after all is the goddess around which the world revolves, so why would she ever look sheepish?)
Here is the part that's interesting that I can't quite figure out - what it is that he wants from me. He was flustered and shy and bashful, but eventually he got it out that he wants to know if we can talk about Torts someday. "I've lost all my pride and all my dignity." Um, how can I help with that? (I'm a dignity and pride-stealer, if you were to ask my most recent ex-boyfriend, who is currently all too mired up in being angry at me to realize I'm out. Trying to scold somebody who just broke up with you doesn't do much - but listening hasn't been his strength of late.)
Has he never asked a classmate to a study group before? He mumbled something about me being smart and liking to hang out with me - certainly neither of which is true of late. He had overheard me say to someone that I used to be a teacher, and from what he said when he introduced himself to me, that was interesting to him.
Maybe his grandmother was a teacher, and he looks to me to satisfy that nurturing "It's gonna be all right, Lab puppy" role.
Oh, I'm being too rude here. He is such a sweet kid, and I only wish he were 15 years older - of course then he'd be married to a Southern Belle with 7 children and a flourishing law practice.
We are all lost. Well, many of us are lost. Ahmed asked me this weekend if I'm going to drop out of law school based on my post last week - but of course I can't afford to. I'm in it. Period. I can't afford to get out. But that doesn't mean that it doesn't rip me apart and shred my dignity. Maybe I'm just hiding it better than Lab Puppy and Southern Belles. I read somewhere today that 80% of all law students don't get a single A their first year.
THAT WILL DESTROY ME.
But we're all like this. All of us here were good students or we wouldn't have gotten in. We are pushed outside our comfort zone and feel lost and stupid and in the bottom third. Today I sat in Civil Procedure and wondered what the hell he was talking about - and this isn't the first time this has happened. And he's my best prof.
OK, great, the geniuses who didn't hook up the electric water heater when they renovated the apartment are here today, and two hours later they haven't done shit except just now blow the fuse in my living room so I have no light. Great.
So I just went out to talk to the quite cute construction boy out there, and we discovered that actually my living room lights are run by the power in the other apartment. We think. And I don't know whose apartment they're hooking the water heater up to, but right now I don't care too much. I just want to wash dishes with warm water and we can sort the rest out later.
I have a splitting headache which isn't going away even with ibuprofen. I went to the gym this morning and worked out hard, but now I feel so out of it that I remembered why I don't like to do that in the morning - it doesn't make me feel good. I revised my paper, but now the most pressing thing is reading 35 pages of French court documents (yeah, in French), and I know I can't do that even without a headache, and I don't really want to waste all my paper and ink on it, so maybe I won't do it. I have errands I need to run but I don't want to leave my apartment unattended while they're working. And I can't really take a nap with them here. And tomorrow I have to be gone all day so that the STUPID ENERGY COMPANY can come sometime during the day, whenever they want, to hook up my electricity. Here's the gem - I have to have the main breaker off until they do. But if I happen to be home and turn the breaker on because I want something like toast or light or air conditioning, then they will not just knock on my door and ask me to take care of it, but they will go away and not come back until I call again with 20 minutes on hold.
I will be really glad when things are all settled. Until, of course, I move again.
Today he wasn't there, and when I saw him later he looked tired and disheveled - after he greeted me, I heard him say to another that he had been working on the big assignment due today/tomorrow. The young girls, they adore him - he always has a flock of blond thangs surrounding him.
Man, I'm loving that I was all stressed about that big assignment at the end of last week in order to get questions in to the instructor before they cut us off at noon Saturday, and I rewrote the whole thing from scratch yesterday. All I have is some more fine-tuning tonight and tomorrow, but then I have to be done because it's time to move on. The more I revise the sentences the worse they become, which is why I rewrote the whole damn thing. I'm not going to do it again. I'm losing perspective.
Anyway, then I left out the building down the street, heading home, and I heard my last name being shouted. There he was, looking like Selma when I've left her somewhere behind, except more sheepish then Selma ever usually looks. (Selma after all is the goddess around which the world revolves, so why would she ever look sheepish?)
Here is the part that's interesting that I can't quite figure out - what it is that he wants from me. He was flustered and shy and bashful, but eventually he got it out that he wants to know if we can talk about Torts someday. "I've lost all my pride and all my dignity." Um, how can I help with that? (I'm a dignity and pride-stealer, if you were to ask my most recent ex-boyfriend, who is currently all too mired up in being angry at me to realize I'm out. Trying to scold somebody who just broke up with you doesn't do much - but listening hasn't been his strength of late.)
Has he never asked a classmate to a study group before? He mumbled something about me being smart and liking to hang out with me - certainly neither of which is true of late. He had overheard me say to someone that I used to be a teacher, and from what he said when he introduced himself to me, that was interesting to him.
Maybe his grandmother was a teacher, and he looks to me to satisfy that nurturing "It's gonna be all right, Lab puppy" role.
Oh, I'm being too rude here. He is such a sweet kid, and I only wish he were 15 years older - of course then he'd be married to a Southern Belle with 7 children and a flourishing law practice.
We are all lost. Well, many of us are lost. Ahmed asked me this weekend if I'm going to drop out of law school based on my post last week - but of course I can't afford to. I'm in it. Period. I can't afford to get out. But that doesn't mean that it doesn't rip me apart and shred my dignity. Maybe I'm just hiding it better than Lab Puppy and Southern Belles. I read somewhere today that 80% of all law students don't get a single A their first year.
THAT WILL DESTROY ME.
But we're all like this. All of us here were good students or we wouldn't have gotten in. We are pushed outside our comfort zone and feel lost and stupid and in the bottom third. Today I sat in Civil Procedure and wondered what the hell he was talking about - and this isn't the first time this has happened. And he's my best prof.
OK, great, the geniuses who didn't hook up the electric water heater when they renovated the apartment are here today, and two hours later they haven't done shit except just now blow the fuse in my living room so I have no light. Great.
So I just went out to talk to the quite cute construction boy out there, and we discovered that actually my living room lights are run by the power in the other apartment. We think. And I don't know whose apartment they're hooking the water heater up to, but right now I don't care too much. I just want to wash dishes with warm water and we can sort the rest out later.
I have a splitting headache which isn't going away even with ibuprofen. I went to the gym this morning and worked out hard, but now I feel so out of it that I remembered why I don't like to do that in the morning - it doesn't make me feel good. I revised my paper, but now the most pressing thing is reading 35 pages of French court documents (yeah, in French), and I know I can't do that even without a headache, and I don't really want to waste all my paper and ink on it, so maybe I won't do it. I have errands I need to run but I don't want to leave my apartment unattended while they're working. And I can't really take a nap with them here. And tomorrow I have to be gone all day so that the STUPID ENERGY COMPANY can come sometime during the day, whenever they want, to hook up my electricity. Here's the gem - I have to have the main breaker off until they do. But if I happen to be home and turn the breaker on because I want something like toast or light or air conditioning, then they will not just knock on my door and ask me to take care of it, but they will go away and not come back until I call again with 20 minutes on hold.
I will be really glad when things are all settled. Until, of course, I move again.
Monday, October 02, 2006
the hardest thing I've ever done, again
And this time he's deleted off my phone.
This time I will remember why.
This time I will force myself to stop thinking of our life together that will not be. I will shred the immigration documents and stop listening to BBC Africa.
This time I will not feel guilt.
This time I will not allow myself to miss him.
This time "sorry" will not be enough.
This time I will remember why.
This time I will force myself to stop thinking of our life together that will not be. I will shred the immigration documents and stop listening to BBC Africa.
This time I will not feel guilt.
This time I will not allow myself to miss him.
This time "sorry" will not be enough.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)