Craig's List

Yesterday I was chatting with Stressed-Out Korean Boy, whom I've grown really fond of. When I say, "Oh, I forgot to bring all my notes for this practice exam and I didn't study at all, planning to rely on them," he said, "You're gonna FAIL!" It's a PRACTICE EXAM. It's not for real. But I realize that's about him, not me - as he said, "I'm ALWAYS stressed-out!" And I don't judge, because I certainly can be that way.

But not right now. I'm mellow because I'm already burned-out. And, I'm already on vacation in my mind - almost every university I ever went to was on quarters, so to be here, on semesters - class is over already to me. Hopefully I kick back into gear soon because that won't serve me well come finals.

So I said to him, "Yeah, I've been wasting so much time." "Doing what?" "I'm ... I dunno. Surfing for flights." I'm going to Portland for Thanksgiving as of last night, and I'm still trying to get to NYC to get the flight to Senegal - but I just remembered I have a friend there that I haven't spoken to in like 20 years. No, I last saw her 20 years ago. She was my camp counselor when I was in, like, middle school, and when I was visiting colleges I stayed a few days with her. She's way cool and we only lost touch because I'm so damn mobile. But there's a chance she's still in the same apartment - so if I could crash on her couch when I come back, then I'll get a later flight AND I don't have to stay the night at JFK. So I wrote her a letter. An actual letter. On paper, with a pen. I felt so ... retro.

So then, I realized what I spend a large chunk of time doing - looking at Craig's List. Nobody ever seems to reply to me about furniture that I see (I am still feeling SO LUCKY that I got that awesome kitchen island there though), but I see many other interesting things. I look at the volunteer section and respond to out-of-towners who want advice about it. I saw an ad for a housing discrimination civil rights investigator and I am SO all over that - they have a training this weekend and hopefully I can get a couple classmates to go. K and I are always talking about this stuff, so it'd be cool if she would want to go.

I also saw an ad for "free room and board for childcare." So I responded, and he responded, and maybe we'll meet soon. He's a lawyer (I thought it was a woman, so I was surprised), which could help me out in several ways - saving major $$ for a few months, making some connections (as long as he's cool like that and doesn't look down on me for not seeing childcare as beneath me), and learning about all the cool, fun things to do with kids in this town. So, I dunno. I really like my little apartment here and my landlady and all that, but I'm stressed about the parking thing, and if I could NOT pay rent now that would be AWESOME. Then even I could buy a house and slowly fix it up, since I wouldn't have the pressure of paying a mortgage and paying rent. So, we would have LOTS more conversation before I would agree to anything. But if what he needs is somebody to be home in the evenings because he's working late - I can so do that, because I'm already home. And the kids are both in school, so it's not the demand of watching a 2-year-old. We could all do our homework together.

And maybe then I'd stop trolling Craig's List so much.

It's not that there's not enough time in the day, it's that I'm not using it well. I feel burned-out so I put work aside until later - because I have a later. If there were no later and I had to do it now, I would - that's how the past couple weeks were.

I dunno, maybe this experience with my test prep class is blurring my vision - they are so enjoyable that I'm regressing even further to my nanny past? Sigh.

But I'm not THAT lazy - I mean, I am getting up at 6:30 in the morning to go the gym before class. Which is where I'm going.