the urge

Oh, and I realized what's making me have the overwhelming urge to pack up the mukluks and head north (though, I would need to trade in the truck for a 4-wheel-drive that can haul dog trailers).

It's cold. I woke up this morning and it was 63 degrees in my apartment. TV (at the gym) said at 7:30 it was 42 degrees in Slidell.

I'm digging on this chill - especially because it is crystal clear blue skies.

Son of Deepo Provera Inventor bets I'll stick around because I like the sunshine. He does not miss Montreal.

But what he doesn't know, what most people in the world don't know, is the cleanness of the air when cross-country skiing at night with moonlight reflecting off the snow, hearing only the "sh-sh-sh-sh" of the skis and an occasional branch snapped by Selma when she runs after something. I don't remember hating the cold in Alaska - except when it was really windy and blizzardy and it burned my skin - that wasn't fun.

It will never be so cold here, but my body - after 22 years in Alaska - is hardwired to expect it. What's winter without the Iditarod?

I'm having a REALLY hard time picturing Dayton and the girls being in Alaska. Poor folks don't have any concept of cold, being from West Africa and all. I'm a little worried that this urge won't pass and I'll come home in 2.5 years and say, "Honey, I got a really great job, and there are lots of opportunities for you there, too. And there aren't many drive-by shootings. We're moving to Fairbanks." I look at Tiff and Rick's yurt construction in Talkeetna and I'm so proud of 'em ... and I just don't see Dayton thinking any of that would be a great idea for us.

Well, hopefully after I graduate law school we'll be able to take a big family roadtrip - drive over to the West Coast and visit all in California and Oregon, then head up to Alaska, maybe driving up to Fairbanks like I used to do each year - over south to see the yurts - and then down to Haines to take the ferry through SE Alaska to see the old homestead. Maybe at that point they will all rise up and say, "We would LOVE to live here!" I mean, just to experience mosquitos that DON'T carry malaria should convince them!

But I'm not holding my breath. My dog mushing dreams may not be realized anytime soon. But I think of Alaska when I think of family - I still believe it's a great place to grow up.