Rebound Boy just left

And let me just say that I have never missed Dayton more than I have over the past four hours.

For so many reasons. So many, many reasons.

It was all fine. But now I'm glad he's gone, and maybe I'll never see him again and that's fine too.

Maybe I'm just not ready for rebounding, and certainly not for any kind of relationship. If all I can think about is my ex? Not even close to ready. And I'm sure he know that, even though I only said something once (he was saying something stupid about his sister saying that if a woman asks a man if the food was good and he says yes then they're ready to get married - and I completely froze when he said that "m" word and I was like, dude, I just broke up with the love of my life that I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with - we don't say that stupid "m" word). (He was trying to say something nice about my cooking but it all came out wrong to me - he was trying to be a superb rebound boy and all that, but it just made me even more uptight.)

So either I'm not ready now, or I'll never be ready. Sigh. Here's the Hot Honduran, whom I've been lusting after for almost three months, and I have his complete and undivided attention, and all I can think about is how he's not as good in all ways? Oy.

So, there's my update. And Ahmed, if you're reading, can I bring you the leftover meatloaf tomorrow?