something I'm good at ... or maybe not

I went today to get my legs & armpits waxed. It was actually more painful than last time, which is the reverse of how it should be.

Anyway, I do this to avoid shaving - to avoid the landfill of razors, of my time and water waste in the shower, and because I love traveling without bringing shave gear. I love that my legs stay unhairy for longer than three hours. It's sweet.

It also cost me $50 for both. Which is a ton of money despite it being majorly discounted from a real salon and I need to rethink it. Maybe I'll start doing it to myself.

Anyway, my body is apparently really good at it - the hair comes right out, first time. They kept exclaiming and exclaiming. I may suck at Con Law, but my follicles are wax-A+. (BTW, I thought again today ... the only classes I've ever skipped are the only classes I got A- in ... [and I've gotten nothing higher] ... the classes I've taken most seriously are my worst grades. Interesting is all.)

Her first questions though were a little annoying. "What care products do you use?" I was feeling really crappy so I couldn't think of anything witty. "Nothing." "Nothing?!" and her horror was not fully mock.

Lectures. About the importance of toner and exfolliant and multiple cleansers and moisturizers. She had me at SPF, but then she lost me again.

So after our session on the way out they fill baskets with products they recommend that we can choose to purchase or not.

Of course I'm always not.

Today's basket: toner - $20; moisturizer - $28; cleanser - $18; exfolliant - $25. Not even including tax, that's $91.

I (at this point a bit impatiently) pointed out to her that I just got back from Nicaragua. That factory workers there make just over $2/day (that's a simplification - there are overtime bonuses and such sometimes, but that's a round number that can be quoted - 40 cordobas).

She suggested that in addition to the unnecessary expense of waxing, that I spend what a maquiladora would make in 45 work days ... nine weeks.

For what? Seriously - FOR WHAT? I already look young for my age - I'm sure I have piles of dead skin cells in my pores just begging to be exfoliated, but seriously. I use soap. It cleans just fine. My face is not the part of my anatomy most desperately in need of toning. [Waxer girl said how refreshing it feels to spritz her face with toner ... um, have you tried WATER?!] And if I can't find a better way to spend $91 than to clutter up cabinets I already have filled with cough drops and Pepto Bismol tablets [my new love - had never tried them before] and insect repellent, then I can just write a check to "Random Nicaraguan Maquila Worker Who Was Fired For Being Pregnant" and I'm sure she can put good use to it.

She, my waxer, shut up. I didn't even have to start on the refugee camp.